iloveyou:DDD

2010-06-24T02:09:00.000-07:00

Have not been updating for ages, working, no time, nothing much to post either.
Drinking lately, that's all.
Ohya, regretted what I did yesterday, veryvery much.
Fucking world crumbling down.
Whatever.. No mood.
Don't climb over my head eh, I have limits.
&, yeah, don't worry I'm giving up on you.

2010-05-29T08:27:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, 28 May, 2010.
Woke up around 1 plus, left house around 2plus. Went to West Mall intending to buy shoes, didn't see one to my liking.

Took a train to Dhoby Ghaut, meeting Jamie at 6.

Walked around Plaza Singapura since I had so much time, saw a few shoes that I liked, but decided to walk on first.

Went to the arcade & saw this hello kitty, so decided to try my luck at catching it, & guess what?

I wasted 34 bucks.

Well, don't be surprised at my so anti-vulgarites blog, I just can't scold anymore vulgarities, I keep to my promise, unlike some people still keep shaking leg. Tsk.

Got extremely agitated & decided to go for a smoke.

Went outside to the smoking corner & lighted up a stick.

Soon, someone kept walking closer & closer to me, I was wondering what she is trying to do.

Finally she got right beside me & said, 'HSA, show me your IC please?'

****

Relaxed myself & soon Jamie called, met him & he was all about black stockings.

Couldn't decide what to do, therefore went to Bugis to eat Fish & Co, intending to sing later on.

Called Veon & had a change of plans, to go prawning.

Jamie paid for my meal; THANKYOUVERYMUCH. :D

Went to Mustafa to look for Veon, only found him after walking for a good 15 minutes, & he was sitting on grass with his friends, wearing all black in a dark dark night.

Jamie & Veon drank some alcohol with Veon's friends, heard it was horrible.

Went to Veon's house, he bathed, took his car keys, drove to Jamie's house, took his car keys, & went to Pasir Ris to prawn.

I went to a place near to 1 plus that looks like this;

With two idiots; Jamie & Veon Kor that looks like this;

& caught this tiny amout of prawns (12) in 3 hours;

I caught 5, not bad for my first time prawning, Jamie caught 3 ( One was let go by accident ) & Veon caught 5.

I am zai. (:

Jamie drove me home, somked with him & he returned home.

THANKYOUVERYMUCH again kor. :D

Reached home at around 5 plus, slept to 4 in the afternoon.

Made my way down to Ang Mo Kio hub for interview at Sticky Rice.

Got the job, do visit me there. (:

That's all for today, work commence at 10.30am tomorrow, will be there till 10pm.

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

Aizai one me :D

Breathing tastes like loneliness., the happiness I wanted is lost in your embrace. As love loses it's passion, all the happiness in the past have been tucked away at a corner. Feeling your heartbeat, missing your existence; I just don't want to be bothered. It's good to pretend, yet I'm still in an ambiguous melody. Caught in a trap I made myself, I'm blinded, helplessly foolish. Pretence.

2010-05-25T10:00:00.000-07:00

SHIT. THIS IS WRONG.
I can't stop my feelings for you, missing you so, so much.

Busy schedule tomorrow, Clememti > Dover > Vivo > Batok. :D
Sounds simple as it seems, but it isn't. It's going to be an oh-so-long day.
Dreading tomorrow.
Was looking forward to Sunday, drinking with Veon, Weijie, Jamie & Zixian.
Apparently Korkor not free, therefore have to re-plan.
Oh well, it can't be helped, Judith treat. :x
Korkor better don't let me catch you shake leg, because I never scold vulgarities. Heh.
Oh lesser vulgarities. :x

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

Replies To Tags

DeborahRomez: RUBBISHHHH, VAN GOT GO K. ♥ TEEHEE. ANW JUDITH LIM CHU PI. WHERE ME AND VAN PIC ): DeborahRomez: liar sia ihy.

DeborahRomez: that goes without saying, all my girls a chio, except those guys they love are all pathetic retards

DeborahRomez: and ugly freaks \m/

- Sigh, sis. Where can like that say? ): I reallllllllllllllllly think less of him liao. O: I'm trying hor. !

Vaney.L: Comfirm boooo? I also say I stop liaoooo. but i still luv him. LOL n

Vaney.L: (Y) I'm not jealous, I just don't like that *****. (Y)

Vaney.L: B.itch* .... LOLL

Vaney.L: No, they are cute. A + D. LOL... OI STUPID JUDITHLIM. You pangseh me ytd. Angry like f luh!

Vaney.L: Waited and waited leh me. -.-

- Eh. D: Idk what to say luh. ): Cry * had to give my timesheets laaaaaa. D: Understanding k? Aizai one.

guest: why liddat one ?

- Huh? & you're? o.o

YANNNYI (:: No lo ! You chio one ! LOL , cheeeeeeerup uhs ;D You sure will find dao new love de ;D

YANNNYI (:: Saw you before and you

YANNNYI (:: are chio . Seriously (: Smileee ;x I more buang leh ): He also dw me ): Stay chioooooooooooooo ! x3

- Laugh, honestly, you have yet to grow up. (: Then you'll ponder more on the true meaning of 'chio'. :D & I've found love, love have yet to find me. :D

Joanne: yup , Ima wisely girlf ^^v

- Oh, hi. (:

laymiin , (: taqqqqqqqqs . .

- Heh. Tys. :D

Aizai one Judith. :D

2010-05-23T07:15:00.000-07:00

Giving up opening the presents' ribbon; used to make me look forward to.
Giving up the midnights' radio; never give yourself into the love songs, again and again, foolishly.

Because love has never taught me how to survive, but as a deal of my vanity to the naive, love has made us a stranger, & not becoming a noble soul within us.

I just need your hug ,not your kiss, I just need you to be my dearest, not loving me.
Do lend me your hand a minute a day, be my dearest, & not becoming my lover or someone’s.

Even if I'm soaked in the rain, I am never going to allow anyone to lead me by the nose once more, if i am still clenching my fist, I'm afraid my dreams will fade away.

& love is not everything, it cannot stop us from war.
& love, it will only be a pity, for those that are deeply in love and being sacrificed.

2010-05-22T22:39:00.000-07:00

Just woke up at around 1pm today, went to drink with best brothers Weijie & Jamie yesterday.
Got really seh, but no drunk.
Only about less than 1/3 of Matell & a few cups of beer got me like this, guess I really suck at drinking. Got rejected to many pubs because of ME. I'm their burden ): But came across Vernis's workplace & asked if I could enter, & she said yes. Drank there, quite.. Expensive. O:
The day before yesterday was this;

West coast park with Deborah & Vanessa, talked about my nonsensical stupidity.
Ate, talked, blew wind, listened lots of 'I not good enough for him', smoked, drank.
Reached home around 12 plus that day. Talked to Deborah on the phone, used a little facebook & fell asleep. :D
Yesterday was this;

After finishing the alcohol, flagged a cab & we three hopped on.
I remember I kept repeating I wanted to forget him. Heh. Jamie left first to Powerhouse; hope you did as you promised. & Weijie sent me home, then back to Yishun where he lived.
I really want to tell youg uys how greatful I am, honestly, no guy would leave without taking advantage of me.
I Love Korkor.
See you guys soon. ;D

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.
Ps : Am I supposed to be happy that we're friends, or sad that that's all we'll ever be.

Replies To Tags
weijie: hello =D my first tag !
- Hello :D Tag more often la eh.

Joanne: Tag and passby (:
- Hello, you're Wisely's girlf I suppose? :D

YANNNYI (:: Tagged again . Chioooobu , stay chiooo ;D
- Hahahah. I chio he won't don't want me liao. O:

zixian: your blog name seem familiar. Anyway, everything will be alright. Take care. (:
- Heh, thanks, leave your blog url? (:

Vaney.L: Hi dumb, you must feel honoured. I hardly tag people recently. You got take picture at the west
Vaney.L: coast park right! Send me. (: Hehehe, and please check out your facebook. Teeheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
Vaney.L: whatever, dog is cute but i am not good enough for him
- DUMB?! Pot calling the kettle black. Fake :x Never take ley, only one only. Did as you instructed, feel proud. Got so many things tell you all, meet up soon. :D Stop whining sist, I can stop, you also can one. O: Aizai.

DeborahRomez: Vaney.L is a ***** who loves a dog :p
DeborahRomez: b'tch lah cb.
DeborahRomez: heeheehee. TAG WOMAN.
- So fierce for what?!?! Heh. THANKS WOMAN. Pretty lady~

Judithuat. ~

2010-05-20T09:49:00.000-07:00

Daddy got hurt real bet today, sigh.
He's kind of bleeding really hobbirly, heart in a mess.
But no, Judith is staying positive, Judith is becoming a grown up.

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-05-19T09:13:00.000-07:00

Work improved today, everything improved today, quater-slacked, three quater- worked.
Found somking partner today, finally not alone.
Horrible staff keep staring, might not be able to hold on any longer if you guys continue.
Not I want one, but, oh well, I was in a bad mood.
You say you don't want to contact me anymore!
I guess I was supposed to feel sad, honestly I was, but my heart doesn't hurt that much anymore.
Thank my great colleauges & friends's support, I'm getting back to normal.
Nadhirah, if you see this, don't worry, it ain't your boy I'm talking about, I'm over him worthy of me even considering, & other's around him who are worth comparing. So don't worry & last long eh, you guys have my best-est wishes.
Ahmai came to look for me around 845pm, slacked with him till 920 where we met his ex girlf, went back intending to close my booth to see it already closed, thank you nice people for helping me :D
This really makes my working experience at Tampiness a little better eh.
Smoked with Ahmai, went to take train home from Tampiness, ate at the coffee shop near West Mall, returned home.
I think I'm very nice today, treat Ahmai cigaratte, eat, drink, when do I do these? Hah.
Judith became a nice & sweet girl.
My favourite line; Aizai!
:D

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

Replies To Tags;
YANNNYI (;: I'm laymin's friendd
- Oh, hello (:

♥ Your Mom Says,: I be lah. the '' SLUTTTTTTT! '' is someone else.
- Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh! Okay? :x

emo: does he still call you at 3.30am every morning now?
- Nope :D

jingqi: relinkk!
- Alrights, sure. O:

2010-05-17T08:17:00.000-07:00

Work was horrible today, very extremely boring.
Pay was 5 per hour, no overtime pay & they tell me work from like, 9 to 930?
Fucking absurd, fucking sot when I heard these news.
VERY very crazy.
Bored, Weijie came looking for me, watched Ip Man 2.
Walked around, ate, Alex came looking for me, watched Robin Hood.
Robin hood was boring, lasted around 2 hours, nearly fell asleep.
Went home after doing some work for 30 minutes?
Hah, slack day.
Whatever, what shit job, pathetic pay, pathetic work.
Nothing else to say. (:
Bye.

Leave, yeah, finally I realize that I'm nothing without you.
My broken heart like a wave, my shaken heart like a wind. My heart vanishe like smoke, it can't be removed, just like a tattoo.
I sigh deeply as if a ground is going to cave in, only dusts are piled up in my mind. Yeah, I thought I wouldn't be able to live even one day without you, but somehow I managed to live on longer than I thought.
You don't answer anything as I cry out "I miss you", I hope for a vain expectation but now it's useless. What is it about that person next to you, does she ever make you cry?
Dear, can you even see me, did you forget completely?
I'm worried, I feel anxious because I can't get close nor try to talk to you. I spend long nights by myself, erasing my thoughts a thousand times.
Don't look back, but leave. Don't look for me again and live on, because I have no regrets for loving you, taking only the good memories.
I can bear it in some way. I can stand it, in some way. You should be happy if you're like this, I become duller day by day.
If we pass by each other on the streets, act like you didn't see me and go the way. Always be happy with her, so I won't ever get a different mind. Even the smallest regret won't be left out. Please live well as if I should feel jealous.
You should always be like that bright sky, like that white cloud. Yes, you should always smile like that as if nothing happened.
I hope your heart feels relieved, please forget about me and live on. Those tears will dry up completely one day, as time pass it will hurt less if we didn't meet at all. Hope you will bury our promise of being together forever baby, I will pray for you. Oh, boy, I cry, you're my all, say goodbye. Oh, my love, don't lie, you're my heart, say goodbye.

Ps : I saw you & you today.

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

Replies To Tags
Ahjing: Tagged : DDD
- Lol, hello. (: Say want come find me never uh.

mitsu: haLO!! h i and buye
- Laughs, hello.

♥ Deborah Says,: siying < Dont ask cigarettes from any of my girls. i fck care you who, they dont owe you.
♥ Deborah Says,: siying < id="SPELLING_ERROR_17" class="blsp-spelling-error">ownself buy. tyvm.
♥ Deborah Says,: correct whut. want cig ownself buy lah, no money dont smoke la.
♥ Deborah Says,: siying < what talking you.
♥ Deborah Says,: siying < or rather, who are you talking to
♥ Deborah Says,: SLUTTTTTTTTTT!
- Eh? Sist, I miss you la. Working now, treat you guys when I get my pay! :O Working like dog now, maybe ,eet you guys when off. Love. :D

Calvin:3: dont 4get me again hor. toot :3 - Laugh, I when forget you? :D
lynn: dun need tell lip le la something happen when the next time see you then i tell you wad happen
- Laugh, I know everything le. You good girl yi dian k. :D

siying: ps lynn=siying
- I know that (:

Qiuya: Hey ;D came to pass-d by, long time no see . hahas, you became more chio uhhs ! stay chio & cheer up
- Hahahas, you guai yi dian la you xmm. :D

Lincoln: Sis. Is that you, if its you. You've changed. Its the same, you're always pretty
- Laugh, thanks bro, takecare of yourself, Judith won't be around very often already (:

THE ONE: HOPE U GET WELL SOON ^^
- Er, you're? :O

MILLIELEE: Where got call me ? I got reply okays . Haha !
- Don't talk cock la :D Ohya, shit cannot talk one hor? :x Heh.

Kerin: JieJie ah! i in hostel. going to 1 month le.i 16 april go in de.17 march GH de.
Kerin: Miss euu so badly):
- You guai yi dian also la, see luh, now go in, happy ma? Stupid girl :O

YANNNYI (:: Although i dunnno you know me anot . But stay chio and tagged
- Turns out I don't know you :x You're?

Andrew: eh kp de... cheer up lei... this is how the real world looks like... i once broke down Andrew: but in the end i still stand up ma.. everything will be alright after some time...
- Laugh, thanks (: I'll get the whole thing someday, just have to accept the fact, just have to keep replaying what Jaga said to me. Btw, you is that ANDREW ah? The bigbig one ah? Heh :O

♥ Your Mom Says,: Ay, i didnt know another pretty lady existed. Hi, Do you have a name of your own ?
♥ Your Mom Says,: Fake Deb - F uck you _l_ (:
- You're? Sorry eh :O

1ClickTag:
1 click to send your message topeoplearound the world!CLICK HERE
- Er? :O

Babykellie: Dearest ah !
- Yes dear? Don't be disappointed, I know what I want in life :D

Something to express my current mood;
I think I'm starting to feel uncertain, it's like something he said was true & right. Are there no other choices? I can only be good and follow as things go. What's sad is that you've already made your decision, right or wrong, it is yet to be told.
In order to gain I have to let go, faking a smile, so many smiles, watching you go. How long do I have to keep up with my disguise of weakness? If I talk about it, how do I keep control of it? This string of love, it is destined to only be this long, difficult, refusing to believe it has already reached it's end.
Thinking you love her more for sure, there's no way for us to get back to the past, still foolishly tracing the string of happiness.
Looking at you leave, my face still smiling. You no longer care,believing that everything is a part of life. Never giving you up before, I'm won't say anything, silently bearing it like a strong girl.
Let the words remain unsaid;
But it's too late.

Life is like a shadow, a poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then it is heard no more; it is tale, told by an idiot full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.
Sometimes hot tears run down, I can't stop it, even though it may be unseen. Sometimes my heart subsides coldly, I can't feel it.

I really want to tell you; just do whatever you want, I want to rid my stupidity though I really love you. I’ve lost most of my friends because of you, but, rather, it cured me, you don’t deserve me, I believed you were my love. I remember the nights I cried to sleep because of you, boy. I’d feel better if you regret it and think of me. Wasn’t it that I was too good to lose but foolish for you to keep? Even if you say a hundred stupid lies, from today onwards, I’m gonna be a bad girl that makes boys cry, then I’ll laugh at you without a teardrop; loser inside a game called love.

When will I have the guts to say these? Sigh.

2010-05-02T08:11:00.000-07:00

Back from a day, went to look for you at your house, talked, chatted.
Brought back the happy memories, & the sad ones.
Slacked alone for a few moments then when to meet Yeongkhen bro, at Batok 5 head funeral.
Saw a few friends there, heading there tomorrow too, I suppose, aftger meeting you in the morning.
Yess I miss you dearly, don't be agitated, don't be angry.
Waiting for you call now, around 3.30am again I suppose.
Hear you soon, love.

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-05-01T21:47:00.000-07:00

Woke up at 9am today, intending to meet you. You didn't call.
Waited for your call till 10am, you still didn't call.
Decided to call you, called numerour times from 10am till 12plus.
Guess you've might have slept, guess you've forgotten about me.
Oh well, it can't be helped (:
I'm so ~~happy~~. Sigh.
Waiting for your call or text now I suppose, how foolish of me, I know, though.
Maybe meeting Sean?
Maybe meeting Gavin?
Maybe meeting Malcolm?
Maybe meeting whoever who jios me out.

Replies to tags I should have replied long ago :O
MILLIELEE: You then **** laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazxc . Heh
- Laugh, crazy. Now change liao la, call you don't want reply liao la hor? Tsk.

crystal (:: Tagg . Be happy always
- Laugh, trys my best alrights :D

Alex ♥: Bleah ! guess who i'm !
- Aiai la! How can forget. Say want come out never come out! Bohxim!

}&, Adeline !: Jiejie, Relink me ! (:
- Still remember me wor, alrights, takecare okay? Anyth call me (:

California: Hello, kinda miss you right now after reading your the post >.< , stay happy. turn over a new leaf.
California: you are really great !
- Laugh, see you sometimes still, right? Takecare of yourself & your bro :x Study hard (:

WAWA: tagged sist (: !
- Wa, still remember me ley, sorry cannot find the ic for you uh.

^^: Hello !! how come so fierce?? lol chill man
- You're? O.o

Huizhong: Relink me
- Sure thing darling, go out soon :D

yvonne: judith !!!!!!!!!!!! <3
- You which Yvonne? :x Sorry.

C.: cheerup sist buey gehyan kiss la! :* Lahahahaha. ily (:
- Laugh, thank you loads (: Must psycho me k, I will, one day, I believe, accept the reality one.

- laymin , (: taqqqqqqqqqqs .
- Haha, be a good girl k.

siying: tagged
- You another one, guai yi dian la. If not I tell Lip (:

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

The tears I might have shed for my dark fate,

2010-05-01T03:37:00.000-07:00

It's been a long time since I have updated, well, I guess I'm back!
My computer have finally returned by my side, & I'm going to update loyally now.
So much have happened since I last updated, 1st April, 2010, I have finally decided to accept Kelvin Wong in my life, yes, I thought we would be happy.
We lasted for a short 27 days, & we broke up on 27 April, 2010. Cause? He returned to his ex girlfriend.
Saddening, isn't it? Lately, I've been thinking. These few who left me for another, Haiqiang, Clinton, Navin, Kelvin. Ain't something in common between them? Laugh, I guess I'm going to keep these to myself.
Kelvin, I thought you were different, guess I was wrong. You'll never see these though, I will just suffer in silence.
Memories, ought to be remembered?
Notes, I wrote frequently during out time spent together.
#1 - Insecurity. You're the serenity, I'm the confusion. You're the reality, I'm the illusion. 最初的天堂, 最终的荒唐.
#2 - & you say sorry like the angel heaven made me think was you. Heartbroken, lovelorn. 假装多好, 我只要, 只想要, 再拥有一秒.
#3 - You don't give a fuck. 好几次我们抱着彼此都是想要哭.
#4 - Baby I know you're only sorry you got caught. My insanity.
#5 - You're irresponsible, uncaring, unreasonable. Yes you've hurt your girlfriend real badly. Sigh.
#6 - Always be my baby ; Irreplacable. Maybe it's true, I can't live without you. 你却在她怀抱微笑, 给你的爱不会停止心跳, 你可知道.

All these, you told me not to delete, to keep these as our memories together, but how? How are these happy, how are these going to be erased from my mind, from my heart.
I guess, I always lose though. Been so many times, I still fail. Tried to trust, stand up once more, but you still say goodbye.
Looks like I'm cursed to experience such pain. Karma, retribution I guess.
Met you yesterday, had to leave at once when your girlfriend is coming. It's all fated? I guess so. Left for Woodlands to meet Sean, audi ex-couple. Spent some time with him & old friend Bryan. Left early to meet Navin for a short while, told him my problems.
I asked, when a guy has a girlfriend, & still contacts his ex-girlfriend, & tells her to wait, what does it mean?
He replied with a question, 'Do you like being loved?'
I understood. Yes I understand this long time ago. I know I'm sort of a back-up. I know I'm just something that shows him extra love & concern. I know, yet I refuse to accept, how foolish can I be.
Went home before curfew time, managed to remain a good girl.
Met Ahmai to smoke & talk about this again, but then I realised no one can tell me what to do, I do what I want, nobody can force me, nobody can talk sense to me, because without me wanting to do it, it will never be done.
Mummy talked to me about it do, & she advised me to leave this three party relationship. I wish I could, but I just couldn't. I wouldn't. Sigh.
Maybe, when the day come I really leave, I will feel much better.

This goes out to someone that is one of the most important person in my life. I didn't realise it at that time, I can't forgive us for the way we treated each other but I didn't expect you either to.. It's just, I don't even know.
You're the one that I want, the want that I need, the one that I got to have just to succeed. When I first saw you, I knew it was real, I'm sorry about the way I made you feel. It wasn't me, let me show you the way, I looked for the sun, but it's raining since day. I remember when I first looked in your eyes, it was like God was there, heaven in the skies.
You wore a disguise because you didn't want me to get hurt, but you didn't know it made everything worse. You told me we were crazy in love, but you didn't care when push came to shove. If you loved me as much as you said you did, then you wouldn't have hurt me like I ain't shit. Now you push me away like you never even know me, I loved you with my heart, really & truly.
I guess you've forgot the times that we shared, when I would run my fingers through your hair. Late nights, just holding you in my arms, I don't know how you could deal me so wrong. I really want to show you I really need to hold you, I really want to know you like nobody can know you. You're number one always in my heart, & now I can't believe our love's torn apart.
I know you're just going to sit and play this with your new woman, & then sit and laugh as you’re holding her hand. The thought of that just shatters my heart, it breaks in my soul and it tears me apart. At times we were off I was scared to show you, now I wanna hold you until I can’t hold you.
Without you, everything seems strange, your name is forever planted in my brain. Damn it, I’m insane, take away the pain. Take away the hurt, baby, we can make it work. What about when you looked into my eyes, told me you loved me as you would hug me? I guess everything you say is just a lie, I think about it & it brings tears to my eyes. Now I’m not even a thought in your mind, I can see clearly, my love is not blind..
I just wish everything could have turned out differently, I had a special feeling about you, I thought maybe you did too. You might understand, but.. No matter what, you’ll always be in my heart, you’ll always be my baby.
Our first day, it seemed so magical. I remember all the times that I had with you. Remember when I first went to your house? You said I looked like an angel wearing that blouse. We hit it off, I knew it was real, but now I can’t take all the pain that I feel. Reach in your heart, I know I’m still there, I don’t wanna hear that you no longer care.
Remember the times? Remember when we kissed? I didn’t think you would ever deal with me like this. I didn’t think you’d want to see me depressed, I thought you’d be there for me, this I confess. You say you are my best friend, is that a lie? Now I’m nothing to you, you’re with another girl. I tried, I tried, I tried, and I’m trying, now on the inside it feels like I’m dying.
And I do miss you, I just thought we were meant to be, I guess now, we’ll never know. The only thing I want is for you to be happy, whether it be with me, or without me, I just want you to be happy.

Memories, yet once again, how do you expect me to forget to easily?
*Underlined : Lies.
Letter to Judith by Chin chin, Kelvin. : 13 Januaury, 2010.
Chin chin is here, Chin chin promise nothing will ever happen to Judith. Chin chin promise to take care of Judith. Chin chin will always love Judith, although starting it was a crush, but now Chin chin know that he love Judith a lot.
He will not let you go, he will pamper you a lot. He will not hurt you, he will treat you like his own family. So don't worry other guys will hurt you again because Chin chin will be your last boyfriend.
Chin chin will wait for Judith no matter what happen, Chin chin is willing to wait for you. Chin chin promise you will be my first pillion. You will be the only girl to sit my bike, I promise no one can enter my heart except you, I say it & mean it.
I only want you, nobody else. I want to take care of you. I know you need time, I understand, I will wait. I don't mind waiting, even if in the end, you choose other guys, I will still wait.
Chin Chin, 21 Januaury, 2010.

& I shall end everything here, this post should be long enough to make up for the past missing posts.
Last message to you;
I will try to not feel sad about you, because you should be dead to me. Feeling sad about something that isn't real & non-existant? That would be stupid.
Kelvin, 010410.
Blame my ignorance, I gave my all once more, but you still left. What else is there to say but, goodbye.
The tears I might have shed for your dark fate, grow cold & turn to tears of hate.
I love you.

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-27T08:06:00.000-07:00

If you argue with him, you're hard-headed. If you're quiet, you don't care.
If you call him, you're too clingy crazy. If he calls you, he says you should be happy.
If you don't love him, he'll try to win you. When you do love him, he leaves.
If you don't fuck him, you're a tease. If you do, you're easy.
You tell him your problems, he says you're irritating. If you don't, he says you don't trust him.
If you lecture him, you just want to argue. If he lectures you, it's because he 'cares'.
If you break a promise, he doesn't trust you anymore. If he breaks it, it's because he had to.
If you cheat, he expects it to be over. If he cheats, he wants another chance.
They're basically the same.
Guys drink to forget about girls; girls drink to think back about the guy.
When guys are in love they become poor; when girls are in love they become pretty.
Guys can forget, but can't forgive; girls can forgive but can't forget.
When guys are heartbroken, they try to forget about the girl by going out with another girl.
When girls are heartbroken, they try to find his characteristics in another guy.Guys wish to be her first love, girls wish to be his last.
Isn't it so true? (:
(Credits, Deborah's blog.)

260310
Today, I went to school as usual, after bring the two drunk men home yesterday.
Was extremely tired, but still decided to attend school.
Went for counselling session where the counsellors told us to write out out life line, the happenings.
& I finally took time to reflect on my life.
I started with being athletic in my primary school life, but smoked at Primary 5, under influence by my sister.
As I started secondary school, I turned over a new leaf, cutting down on the stealing, vulgarities, etc.
I became the class monitor, student counsellor, advocate, talked on stage, commentator for sports say, etc.
Soon enough, I got bullied, I turned to gangsterism, thinking that if it isn't me bullying people, people will bully me, & this realisation brought about the me now.
Talked about smoking heavily, him, some heavy impacts on my life & so on. One detail was putting the tattoo.
The counsellor then asked, what was my highest point & lowest point.
I answered him, " My highest point is ever putting that tattoo, & getting to be together with him, where was where my depression started. My lowest point is also, ever putting that tattoo, & getting to be together with him"
What contradictions.
Thid counselling made me think a whole lot, & reflect on my past & how to make them better.
They told me to forgive myself for my wrongdoings. But even if I have the strenght & confidence to forgive myself, will the others?
Met Chin today once more, really thought about his words.
I really realise now, how the others think of me. I may be a horrid person to them, I may cause trouble to them, but I don't mean it at all. I know myself best, & that I'm not such person you guy think I am.
Guess I just cannot change you guys perception because of the mistakes I once made, maybe I'll stick to being the bad guy for life.

270310
OMG YOU REPLIED I'M SO HAPPY.
Why?
Sigh, heard that Jianfeng had an accident, wish him well.
Saw Xavier & chatted with him, the emotions shot me, & I stumbled.
Guess I still can't forget you, I really don't know why.
How do I express this feeling? Sad? Happy? I really have no idea.
But the past just could not ever be the present once more, you wouldn't it, sigh.
Whatever, I should get some sleep, wish you well.
I really regret ever quarreling with you for the first time, I might be happy in love with you right now, sigh.
But what's the point? Sigh.
I love you, so very much.

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-24T07:49:00.000-07:00

Been a long time since I updated.
Mummy's nagging about me about my smoking habits. I'm disgusted with her crude remarks, guess this is what I get for being naughty.
These few days, slack with Chin & Jaga, nothing much to elaborate.
I don't know myself if my stress level is decreasing or increasing, laugh.
Bringing myself to a new reality, where reality is reality.
No more being childish, no more being gullible, no more being ignorant. When will I learn that guys, will always remain guys.
Unhappy with my looks now, going to change it, when? Soon I guess. I'm going unique.
Unhappy with my life now, going to change it, how? This needs serious consideration eh.
Wonder if ******** & **** are real friends, ones that I can trust. Well I almost trusted you, nearly fully, but you crushed it in one simple sentence, & yet again.
Prove me wrong, change me (:
Did not attend school today, well, I wanted to, but after smoking I walked to the gate, & ended up late. Went home to rest, then met them.
Life is good! Is it?
& ya, I only have one word for you, despicable. Worthy? Not at all.

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-21T08:09:00.000-07:00

Your ignorance disgust me.
Oh well, I finally got to understand I don't need you after all.
Life is getting back to normal after these few childish & senseless arguments, everything you do or say are nullified.
Sisters are treasures, good friends are treasured too, thanks for being there when I was at my worst, when I needed you guys.
Love (:

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-18T09:39:00.000-07:00

TO THE PERSON WHO LOVES CALLING OTHERS BITCH (:
YA YOU.
FUCK. OH MY GOODNESS. WHAT ENTERTAINING THINGS HAPPENED SO SOON, HAH, I USED TO REALLY HATE 'BESTFRIEND', THIS PHRASE, BECAUSE I WAS ONCE CHEATED BY IT (:
YOU KNOW, SOME PEOPLE ARE JUST TOO YOUNG TO REALISE THAT I HAVE LEARNT NOT TO CARE SO MUCH, OR PUT SO MUCH HEART INTO EVERYTHING I DO, OR RATHER, DID.
LAUGH, I UNHAPPY LEA, WHAT IS THERE TO BE UNHAPPY ABOUT? GOODNESS SAKE. I? CARE? LAUGH. SADLY, I DON'T.
BITCH BITCH BITCH, THAT'S ALL YOU KNOW EH? POT CALLING THE KETTLE BLACK, I SUPPOSE? EVEN IF I AM UNHAPPY, NOT SAYING I AM, THOUGH, THAT'S NOT YOUR FUCKING BUISNESS YOU KNOW? NOT THAT I DID SOMETHING TO HARM YOU OR SOMETHING. SO WHAT FOR YOU FUCKING CARE? MY UNHAPPINESS DOESN'T AFF ECT YOU IN ANY WAY -.-
GET A LIFE & STOP BEING NOSY ABOUT MY FUCKING LIFE. LIVE YOURS WELL EH. HAH, VIOLENCE, I'VE ALREADY GREW UP LONG BEFORE YOU TO REALISE IT ISN'T THE BEST SOLUTION. PLEASE, STOP TRYING TO ACT LIKE YOU ARE OH-SO-GOOD-AT-EVERYTHING.
YOUR PERSONAL LIFE DOESN'T & WILL NEVER AFFECT ME, IN CASE YOU DON'T KNOW. HEH, AFRAID? OH YA I AM SO AFRAID. IF HE WANT TO BE TAKEN, HE WILL, & MAYBE I WILL EVEN THANK YOU FOR MAKING ME REALISE HE WASN'T WORTH IT.
THINK YOURSELF BEFORE YOU WANT OTHERS TO.
YES, LEARN TO LAUGH AT YOURSELF.
HA-HA-HA.
TSK, What has this world become, full of people who needs self reflection.

2010-03-18T06:29:00.000-07:00

Went out to complete project assignment for school today, ain't I a good girl? Laugh.
Went home after that, met some new people, not bad a day I suppose?
Pathetic phone spoil again, make me so angry eh. Getting the phone on Saturday I assume, so happy.
Accompanied Melissa to take 178, after the rest two guys went to eat.
Reached home around 3 plus, if I remembered correctly, slept because some people didn't answer my call.
Went down to smoke & Chin called, met him for a few moments, knew some truth he once hidden from me, but I can forgive, all because he told me the truth. So forgiving I am, ain't I?
Went home for like, 5 minutes? Then went back down because CDhin was kind of emotionally unstable? Chatted, & returned home.
There are a few things, I should ought to know, & I should learn to practice what I preach. For example, I always say, don't do bad, because there will be retribution, which I have suffered lots of it already. When someone plays with your feeling, don't play back, because when people do wrong, we should be sensible enough to differentiate between right & wrong, & choose to be the good guy to prevent regrets in the future.
I have tried & tried to be like those playboys, but have failed, because I just don't know how to be unfaithful. Oh well, maybe some refuse to believe, but I am in no position to assure anyone. Even so, I still ask the same old line, what for? Laugh.
This is so entertaining. I have felt the fire many times & have been burnt, but I will never trade the pain for what I have learnt. Every minute is just like an hour, an hour like a day, a day like forever, but I everything with a start will end, just realise that the end will come sooner or later, & there will be a new start. Currently going on with life, enduring these long seconds, hoping I can really see how retarded I am, & learn not to be the pathetic one in the future.
Need to scream, want to run or maybe hide, away from the world and their prying eyes. All I want is for you to be by me side, & we can live in a place built by your lies.
S(he) be(lie)ve(d), again.

AIN'T I STUPID? GOODNESS.
Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-17T08:02:00.001-07:00

Why is it you affect me so much? This isn't what I expected from the start. Is the start a wrong choice I made in the first place?
No, I'm not going to think so much anymore. Something with a start must have an end. Whenever it will be, I know I have not done anything unfaithful to you. I know everything was true, but, oh well. Heard many things others have said about you, but a chose to put those apart. Why am I acting this way? All these isn't important. Now, I need someone to talk sense into me, because I know I'm stupid, but I'm continuing my stupidity (:
Oh ya, good luck for your court tomorrow, hope to meet you soon (:
Take care of your health, your throat, everything.
I love you (:

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-17T07:25:00.000-07:00

Stayed at home all day.
I really miss you ):
Btw, I'M SO IRRITATED!
HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Is this a love game? Let's play a love game (:

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-15T07:29:00.000-07:00

I will not fucking ask anything from you anymore (:
I will not fucking give a shit if you do anything which I used to mind (:
I will fucking live my life as per normal, as maybe I didn't know you in the first place (:
I will fucking show everyone I am strong.
I will fucking live without you, if that is what you prefer.
I must.
But I love you. Sigh ):

2010-03-14T06:28:00.000-07:00

Texted you when I woke up. You told me you were going out with the rest. You asked me to come along, & I did. I was so happy.
Upon reaching the shopping centre, bought the movie tickets & went to walk around. You looked at me, I fake a smile so you wouldn't see through my emotions. Returned to the cinema to catch the movie. Sitting beside you, I simply can only wish that moment can remain forever. Everyone might think that I'm obsessed, but they don't realise that I think you're the best. The movie seemed to pass so quickly, went to boon lay, & I left after the rest ate their dinner.
Thinking about food, it has really been 4 days since I ate, I'm starting to ask what hunger is.
I had a really great time today, with you, because its you. Left to where you parked the bike after they ate. You said:" Do you want to go to the funeral with me? Or you want me to send you to Jurong Point?" I replied:" I don't know, who is at the funeral?" You replied:" I don't know, all guys." I replied:" Sigh, I just go home." You replied:" How?" I replied:" Take bus, there *points to the direction of the bus stop. Bye." You replied:" Bye."
I really wonder why I held back tears then, & as I turn around to leave, they fell instantly. How could I have felt this way? Sigh, I walked home today, from Boon lay shopping centre to Bukit batok. The tears only stopped at my doorstep, honestly, I wonder what is with my mood lately. I guess I am really fortunate to have you loving me, at least once. For this is enough, or rather, more than what I have ever expected.
It is really very wierd that, so much heartbreak can come out of so much happiness. Though I am no angel, I'm not a devil, & despite what you think I am still fragile. My affection for you is still not defeated, behind my eyes my soul have been cheated. If I say I love you, would you still smile? I certainly would if you did. I bet she's beautiful, & she definetely has everything I have to live without. I don't want to be your second option, really. You taught me to love, you taught me to cry, but before you left me, you didn't teach me how to forget.
Half of me wants to be with you, & the other half just wants to be over you. The two hardest things to say in life are really 'hello' for the very first time, & goodbye for the last.
Are you home? You aren't texting me, again. Everytime my phone rings, I open it with exitement, realised, & ended up in disappointment. When will it be you? Sigh. You know I do something really stupid every night, when you don't reply my text, I don't want to text you again, to refrain from disturbing you or irritating you, I set alarm to wake up every hour to see if you have replied. Funny eh? Sigh. I should learn to really stop yearning for you.
Do you know I'm waiting for your text? Sigh. I love love you ):

I know maybe I don't stand a chance, I'll walk away, I promise. Love might make us strangers, I know I'm not worthy, never the girl of your dreams.
Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-12T07:10:00.000-08:00

I realised now its not only once that you lied, its alright now, since I knew only when everything ended. Covered myself fully with thick make up today, hoping dearest sisters won't see through my emotions. ( I hope thay don't see this line )
Texted you, in a very serious tone, after all, she's a great girl, what's there not to love?
I'm nothing, I have a bad reputation, & I'm not even pretty to the least, not sweet, not caring, fierce to you as you say, or rather, over protective in a nicer tone. Even if everything starts again, I have the phobia of you running off to meet her, so, what for? Sigh. The phrase 'Stand-By', its so ugly.
I just didn't want you to be my past, to end like the rest of my ex boyfriends.
It's saddening to end everything like that, but I understand, she's your true love, so I'll just learn to forget you, & maybe let the memories stop there? I have totally no idea what to do, sick & tired of everything.
Still, at night, I think about me & you. I think of the great days we had, before you said we were through. You're close to my heart, even though you're far away. I try to make things straight again, but I wonder when I'm going to be okay. How am I supposed to feel about everything that have been done? I don't know if I should stay, or turn around & run. Now that you have hurt me, things can never be the same. The only love I ever knew, am I throwing it all away?
I think of you in silence, I often hear your name, all I have left are memories & an unforgiving pain. My heart aches with sadness, & my tears will flow, what it meant to lose you, maybe only she knows. But wait, she never lost you in the first place. There's no love, like lost love, no pain, like a broken heart. There's no love, like you & me, no loss, like us apart. Well I guess that only applies to me.
You left behind a broken heart & happy memories too. But I never wanted memories, I only wanted you. It's really ironic how a person can be depressed if they still haven't found the one they love, when another person can be depressed with the person they love. You might be better off without me, but I'm screwed without you.
S(he) Be(lie)ve(d).

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-10T22:45:00.000-08:00

As everything ends, I really wonder if there will be a new start. If something is alive, it will die eventually, just like out love that died instantly.
Everything you said, everything you did, although it is really such a short period of time, but I just have no ability to just let everything go like that. The truth hurts, a lie is worse. I am so confused with what is real & not, & all of a sudden, your loyalty falls apart.
Yesterday was yet another typical day of my past, not being able to sleep, smoking to the max, loss of appetite, crying like a dog. I may regret the way we ended, but I'll never regret what we had. If this is the way things are really going to end, you turned out to be the person you promised you wouldn't.
& now I ask myself, does it even matter now? Sigh.
I know its not just about whatever reason you said, I understand, now, I lost all your love, or was it that you didn't love me at all? I guess I didn't do a good job at loving you, because you love her, not me. Trying to keep the thought that I am a tool away from my mind. I'd never thought you would hurt me, I guess I live & learn, that when I play with fire, I'm bound to get burned. I really should have known.
When you decided to leave me, I didn't say much. What could I say? I wanted to pull back so much, intense begging wasn't going to be of use, just pass it off as loneliness, although it still can be felt when you're not alone. The you that doesn't belong to me in the first place, is it going to remain unreachable? Out of everything, why did you have to be my weakness? I can somehow understand, she was somewhat a release to you, so just answer honestly, you love her, more, right?
You really love her, as my punishment, retribution. Saying you don't love her anymore was just pitying me. I don't have any excuses, I can only let go, I don't have the courage to ask of your love from you. You really love her, she must be really nice. You really miss her, just voice your thoughts. I have nothing to say, I cover my ears, don't ever want to think about you loving her.
Someone once told me, don't ever give up, if I still want to try. Don't wipe my tears, if I still want to cry. Don't settle for an answer, if I still want to know, don't say I love him, if I can't let him go. Although happiness with you doesn't seem like its going to be forever, at least I once had the best of you. Or had I? Distance, it's not hard for me to wait, just hard for me to not have you by my side.
I know I shouldn't be dwelling over all your words, or over analyzing our goodbye. I shouldn't wonder if you're hurt too, at all. I really don't mind if you ask anything of me, I would be happy to present it. But why do I care? When you're not even willing to return me something so simple, such as loyalty, all I asked of you. You really don't know, when you texted saying I deserved better, that you were the best. The fears of today, are the nightmares for tomorrow only because they were the pains from yesterday.
Don't fall hopelessly in love, don't fall hopefully in love. My past, tried hard to put it down for you, yet, it still turns out like this, will there ever be a change? Past will be past, because I fell, he faltered. I scraped my heart, he walked past. He fell, I faltered. He scraped his heart, I walked past. He feels hate, I don't care. I can't hate, he doesn't care.
Having left me, I won't move, in case if you are nice enough to return sincerely, you would know where to find me. As I abandon myself at the corner, some hand over loose change thinking it would solve my problems, but I'm not broke, I'm broken. I wasn't sure why you chose me at the start, but deep down, I feel that you settled with me, because you couldn't have her. If everything is going to have a fresh start, please reconsider, & don't say you love me if you don't mean it, because I will respond insanely, such as believing it. Its just the same old story as everyone knows, one grasping on, the other letting go.
I want to be your lady, I love you.

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-10T06:11:00.000-08:00

Fuck. I'm getting a horrible headache.
Met ♥Bi after school, went to Jurong West secondary outside met Christine, Anson, Kerin & a few others.
Went to 9 head had some conflict with Joey Ang.
Went to safra after then, watched the guys play pool & billard, me myself, along with Lexian♥ & Christine open pool table.
Halfway guys got problem, left us alone.
Walked to Jurong Point to join the guys.
Got really agitated because of trival matters, I have no idea why.
Went to DDR & ♥Bi sent me home; thanks loads.
Slaped a 23 year old for commenting on my boyfriend, venting my stress & anger at the same time.
I really have no idea why the fuck you leave early & only reach home at 10. Damn irritated, you don't even reply, say you're driving. How the fuck I know where you go, what you go, & maybe who you meet. You cannot blame me for thinking this much, if I were to do the same, you would react like this too. When my fucking phone ring, keep hoping is you, but turns out not to. Fuck, since you don't want to care, I wouldn't too. Just text me when you want. Don't have to tell me where the fuck you go, what the fuck you do. I can't stand it anymore, this is the first time I encounter such problems, & I fucking don't know how to handle, adding on my fucking depression. I will try hard not to care, wish me luck to excel in it. Fuck.
I love you la. Cb, I'm going crazy.

Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-09T06:40:00.000-08:00

♥Bi neglect me, he never meet me today ):
Stayed at home for the whole day just like a typical good girl, be proud of me.
Sex talk in school today,
Love; more than just a feeling, being able to accept the good & bad of the other.
Sex; for both to enjoy, physical intimacy.

Replies To Tags (:
Gcys: Sorry! I'm a good girl now, how you? (:
LeXian: It turned out fine, see you soon, love. {♥}
- CLARAAAAAAAA ;D: Laugh, I survived, see you sround eh.
-: I'll cherish him, I know he's a good guy (: Tc :D
ღ , 微 D e b o r a h.: I'm so happy for you as I am happy for him too, heh. Love you la dey! See you tomorrow or what, love. {♥}
jolene: Hi slut. Go school ah, love. {♥}

I know you might be feeling a little, oh I don't know how to explain eh. Just hope everything turns out fine, if ever you regret, I will never blame you, because I understand every part of it. Love you loads :D {♥}
Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-08T05:46:00.000-08:00

Mummy & Daddy brought me to school today, but only went in after 8.30am because they went to eat.
Meet Jolene♥ & Vanessa♥ along with Jianfeng, JIngsong, Darence, Gary & Alven.
Finished smoking & for the first time in my life, I ran to school to avoid being late, be proud of me.
Went to almost every single class, other than English & Pe. Be proud of me again (:
Met Jolene♥ & Vanessa♥ after school. Before meet them I lighted a stick behind school bus stop, & HSA stopped me. Heng he put chance :D
Went home alone because ♥Bi woke up at 1plus. PIG RIGHT? Tsk.
Changed & prepared & met ♥Bi at my house downstairs, sent me to IMM to collect my pay of $76 only.
Went to Boonlay with ♥Bi to play lan while he went billard-ing with Anson.
He left me alone at lan & went to find Kaixiang at tattoo shop. He neglect me ):
Left me there for ages while I immersed in Audition, sae Jiajia & Janice (:
♥Bi came up & play billard again, this time with Joseph, Sheryl, Kaixiang, Jianfeng, Chinchin, Andrew & Anson.
- Sheryl, don't sad ):
Left quite soon after, then went to Jurong Point where this nice guy helped those who drive about their bikes, & he's a policeman. Wtf -.-
Went to carpark look for Deborah♥, Jolene♥, Lexian♥ & the rest, fed my dear Deborah♥ milk coffee & like, 10 minutes later, ♥Bi sent me home.
Slacked awhile with ♥Bi then went home.
My comb lost on the way home -.-
♥Bi, hurry home, you are so not to neglect me :D
Loveloveloveyou ♥

♥Jovell.L'Jiaxin.

2010-03-05T10:17:00.000-08:00

Above : The tattoo ♥Bi & Deborah♥ & a little of myself made for me (:
Slept at Deborah's house, did not attend caurt as planned.
Mummy texted later on saying court gave chance, what a sigh of relief eh.
While asleep at Deborah's house, had two horrifying nightmares.
The first was getting caught after court issued warrent of arrest & ♥Bi & everyone don't want me.
The second was getting bitten by zombies from the show 'Zombie Strippers' & ♥Bi & everyone also don't want me.
How horrifying, honestly, woke up tearing.
♥Bi keep say come find me after the problem, from 4pm say until 7.
Went down on my own accord then (:
Quite retarded problem they had, wasted so much time & manpower.
W/e, everyone should be happy that I'm safe & sound, returning to school on Monday :D

To : Deborah♥
Sist, I know you care lots & lots, thanks loads for accompanying me throughout what I called my 'last few days'. Heave a sigh of relief when it wasn't. I'm somewhat a free person now, but still having to stick with my curfew. Turns out my worry was unecessary.
Sist, I know you've been thinking about him & him & him. The first, I really think you should forget him, because, you know you're unhappy with him. Nothing, even guilt can make up for love. You know yourself if you don't love him, don't force yourself to be with him. This you told me yourself before uh. It'll only cause more harm to him & you yourself, which is more important (: Duh. The second, we all are not sure whether she did it on purpose, but what for cling on to something that is never going to come back to you? It's the same with my case, although yours is very much longer, but the concept is the same luh. If you can tell me all those logic when I was going crazy over him ( You know who ), you must be role model ma, show everyone you're BEBE :D & the last. It's not impossible luh, but seriously, if you remember the sister-must-approve thing, I won't approve luh. I already stated my reasons, you should really consider everything before anything. As I've said always, there are choices in life that we make, & this choices we still make OURSELVES, so we should not regret. If we have to blame, we only have ourselves to blame (: You should get yourself away from A people :x
Heh, Bebe the beautiful lady eh?

Iloveyou ttm la. DEYYYY. *Indian bitch♥ (:

*Inside joke.

To : ♥Bi.

I know what you have been thinking or once thought. Just letting you know that, bike or no bike, I'm sticking with you (: Be it what everyone thinks, whether I'm using me or what fcuk, bullshit. I really trust you luh ♥Bi, but you must understand how many times I have been played, I will scared mah. Sigh, not that I want anything, but since I realised you don't like it, I wouldn't care anymore. Talk, look, anything, I'll just treat it as nothing, if that's what you wish.

Having said those, I won't do the same luh, so no need worry. I will not give you any reason to shoot me back :D Heh. Stop worrying about your case, seriously, I accompany you throughout. I know it will be a big blow if it turns out for the worst, but I just hope you wouldn't harm your health. & please, *CHOY*, if really turned out to be the worst, please don't drive. I accompany you take bus everyday :D Cyoutomorrow :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Please bring the tattoo thing, or Deborah will whack me :x

Love. (:

♥Jovell.L'Jiaxin

2010-03-03T20:03:00.001-08:00

<: Hi Jovell, this maybe the last night together with you >:

But dont worry girl, i'll always remember you. This above pic is for you and navin. I hope you both will last long & cherish each other. No matter what ups and downs please, stay together. Maybe you both had an unhappy past. Its time to put it down and carry on with your lives. Things may never turn out the way people always wanted. Girl, i hope nothing will happen to you. As if you want to run or not, i dont know. I cant ask you not to run or ask you to run. Because, if im you, i wouldn't know what to do myself. Whatever happens in the future, you're still my lil sis :) I seriously dont wish anything to happen to you. You're a nice girl, sometimes somethings, forgive and forget. Just remember, control your god damn temper you dirty slut. Dont anyhow get angry or what. I cant be by your side forever right? I mean i want to lah, but there would be one day, when i'm not with you anymore right. So, take good care and remember every things that i've told you. Dont cut, dont eat panadol as and when you want. >:(

I love you Jovell Lim Jia Xin >:

Muaaaaaaacks.

- (L) Deborah.KWX.

Loves you, <:

2010-03-02T06:56:00.000-08:00

Met ♥Bi at Woodlands at around 3?
Drove me to put petrol then to Jurong point where we the Lightning Theif.
It was not bad, but quite retarded luh.
♥Bi said I'm pretty today (: I'm pretty everyday.
Laugh, Kaixiang & Lexian came later on, watched Lexian buy her pants then went to Woodlands with ♥Bi to see the mo regarding his case.
Turns out that he couldn't see the mp today because of his probation, how sad.
Brought me around Woodlands area & met his friend later on.
♥Bi sent me toCauseway & made my way home (:

To : ♥Bi.
I don't care what others say, I'm sure I'm in love with you right now. I know it wasn't really real feelings when everything started, but now, I affirm you (: The chances of me getting in is terribly high, & the percentage of me getting into girl's home is higher than that of hostel & probation uh.
If I became a memory, whthrew from your life, leaving you startled, no longer able to embrace you, thinking that I have to leave you, the one I love to live every day with alone among the sea of people, I will hate myself for being so heartless. If I became a memory, no chance again for us to watch the sunset together. In this long period of time, your broken heart will heal. If someone were to come by & is able to heal your wound, do let her stay, I will never blame you. I really want to embrace you tightly & let you know you're one of the few in my life I can't bear to leave most.
If I became a memory, I'm most afraid I will let myself down. Stubbornly lingering in the air, dominating every part of your heart, making the you that loves me suffer. This isn't fair. When the time comes, please try your best to forget me.
Sigh.
Iloveyou.

♥Jovell (:

2010-03-01T05:50:00.000-08:00

Mummy hugged me today.
Woke up at about 1plus today. after eating lunch Daddy cooked, showered then left home.
Met ♥Bi at JurongPoint along with Lexian & Kaixiang.
♥Bi smoked & proceeded to purchase sushi & drinks at B1.
Went to slack & 'Jolene's house' for quite some time then Sheryl & Shaohui came up.
They left soon later to watch a movie.
Kaixiang went out to meet someone? Met Deborah♥, saw Jiajia & some familliar faces.
Went back to slack & Jolene♥ & Jianfeng came.
Time passed extremely quickly today, ♥Bi & sists, I might be gone anytime after Friday, would you guys miss me? Sigh.
♥Bi. I have to complain, the numerous bruises you gave me are spotted by Daddy.
HOW ARE YOU ACCOUNTABLE TO THIS?!?!
Heh.
Waiting for ♥Bi to reach home now, hope he drives safely & quickly nudges me when he returns home (:
DeborahKoh! Thanks for everything, I love you so fcuking much la, even though if it doesn't show that much, but seriously, nothing can explain my love & gratitude for everything, love (:
I have yet another story, it is fiction. Means its not true at all. Ya.

A few months back, or rather, half a year ago, I met him. Z was just like any typical guy you'd see anywhere. We knew each other through friends. Well, how do I explain this, I was single then. Not to brag, but I had quite a few admirers, some for reasons I'd rather not mention, rest maybe for love? Whatever. Among everyone, I chose Z. A big mistake.
We started off just like the rest & broke up after a few days later due to trival matters, but solved & we were back together again. The days went past so quickly & soon it was our first month. Guess what? He forgot. It didn't matter, it just passed off as any other day. Few days later, I still remember, we had an argument about jealousy. It was quite alright, but it turned out that we broke up in the end. He told me he regretted letting me go, I brushed that idea off, & I ended up with quite a number of cuts on my left hand, now still in the process of healing.
I met Y then, he did a great job on telling me to leave Z, & thus it happened, & thue I started developing little bits of feelings for him. When I finally mustered the courage to spill it out, I got rejected, for the first time. It was alright then, just adding a few cuts on my hand once more. As I slowly removed my affection I had for him & carried on with life. Later on then, Y asked me to be his girlfriend. Why? I slowly deveoped the feelings back, & guess what? He has a girlfriend. What remarkable flirt he is. Bullshit. There, Y became past.
X came along the way, I accepted him in my life. A horribly wrong move I suppose. I shall not elaborate on this part, just know that he's a dog just like most of the guys out there.
I decided to patch with Z, thinking that he could be Y's substitute, which turns out horribly wrong. I fell back in love with him again. We agreed to give each other space, then I met a group of people. Having just met this group, I have started spending time with them, only meeting Z once since we patched. I did wrong, & was remorseful. Horrible things happened within that group & I honestly regretted meeting that group. Black sheeps you can say, but in there there was this one white sheep. Z broke up with me again because I was neglecting him. This, I agree, it was my fault, but what is the bullshit that everyone is saying I was together with him for his money?! Whatever.
This white sheep, W. He's a nice guy, & I could say he liked me, truly. I was so mesmerized with Z I left him after Z returned to me. Guilty? Yes. Karma? I believe. This is proven later on when Z broke up with me again. I met V. V was also a nice guy whom I had a good feeling about, but he left after his ex returned. Just like that, what goes around comes around.
Patched with Z once more, he told me he regretted letting me go again. Bullshit, really. I still remember, I stayed at his house for 3 days. In these 3 days, the first was the only wonderful experience I had there. We were just as sweet as any couple. The following day, he changed. He texts other girl, this, I force myself to accept, because I love him, that's my reason. All I did was run to the toilet & relieve my stress with a few more cuts on my left hand. I watched him sleep when he was sick, I cleaned his vomit when he was drunk. Yeah, maybe this isn't significant at all. But what he did in return might be too much?
I asked for breakup upon finding out those texts to the girl, saying he misses her & all those, I really regreted it then. I sniffed glue & did a whole lot of foolish stuff which wasn't worth anything at all. All I wanted then was to get back with him. He said he needed time, a week. I waited, & he returned to me. I was happy, I suppose. Soon after, he needed to go in for something he did wrong. I promised I'd wait.
In the meantime, I saw several texts that hurt me quite bad. He tells the girl he fancies her, & that I literally mean nothing to him. But, he called me after he was sentenced in court. For that, I put everything aside. & guess what? He came out, & broke up with me.
What a wonderful ending (:
I waited & waited after the breakup knowing he would not return. I was gullible, thinking that my persistence would move him one day. No. I was fucking wrong. I asked myself, where is the simple and honest truth within his words? Should i believe him and get my heart ripped out again? Or should I leave, knowing that I still have my dignity and sanity left within me? & I left. Smart eh? People like Z should perish. Along with Y & X. This is a message to all girls out there, no one should get this much hurt in a short 6months like I did.
Give it all up & start afresh (: Love.
---------------------

♥Bi finally contacted me @ 10.52pm. He scared the hell out of me. Whatthefuck. Do it again I'll show no mercy (:

Iloveyou ♥Bi.
Girls wants sentences, boys gives words ._.
YOU'RE A SICKO WITH KAWA. LOL. Bebe say one (:
I care, therefore I do. Heh :D
Love.

Jovell♥ (:

2010-02-28T09:29:00.000-08:00

Deborah Koh.

Hi sister :) ,

No matter where you are. No matter what you do. No matter what you are. You've me. But, excluding those, stealings, glue sniffing etc. :P I hope nothing will happen to you alright. & Last long with Navin. Although he's stupid, likes sniffing panties, stealing aunty's bra, licking Kayden's butt hair, sucking Kayden's dick, humping his dog, but he's a nice-but-not-so-nice-as-me and cute peanut guy * Winks * Not cute-er than you-know-who. But ! Navin is still nice. LOL. Me & Navin got things in common ya' know?! Like, He likes sniffing panties, i sell panties. So he can help me sniff out some panties for the customers, we both have eyebrow piercings, but mine obviously nicer lah, cause the piercer is me lah. LOL. Anw, main thing is. I rock you suck lah. You think you very chio meh? You think you very cute meh? YOU THINK ONLY LAH. & your thinking is correct. :D Nevertheless, im still here for you :) I love you stinky bitch. * Smooches ♥ *

Loving A, J&J. LOL.

Deborah.KWX.

I ♥ Navin :D

2010-02-28T07:54:00.000-08:00

After Bi left me & Kerin yesterday, went to DDR @ Westmall.
Slacked all the way until 5 waiting for Bi to come down.
He said 5. I waited, 6.. 7.. 7.47pm.
Fcuking late right ?!?!?! \
&& He say want give me chocolate, then he break my chocolate D:
&& My Pink helmet ):
&& My flowers ):
WHERE ?!?! Tskkkk ~
Is this counted as a lot of complains?
No right?! Lol (:
Went to meet Deborah, Jolene, Jianfeng, Kaixiang & Lexian.
Decided to ton, Mummy went berserk.
Now she insists for me to go in, & I made the decision to leave home until I'm 16, when she can;t charge me anymore.
8 months, the cash, the danger, but it's worth a try.
Lets name this person DOG.
Well, DOG is a big fat ugly mean person.
He keeps psycho-ing my mother to send me in.
Why can he think like others? Wonders what I can do to convince Mummy this isn't the right solution.
I HATE THAT FCUKING DOG.
HE SHOULD DIE MANZXC.
Tsk, useless education-er.
You know, I really really hate it when you dogs use bpc to force me to do stuff.
I can be obedient even without this shit, seriously, now you dogs push me to my limit.
If I really go in, I'll kill all of you.
After all, I'm underaged.
Ohwell, forget it. Just give it a shot & see how it goes.
This post is to put across a message to these two people in my life.

- Deborah & Jolene,
Sist, as you can see from the above content, Mummy have decided & is firm. I'm left with no choice but to do as stated. I'm going to be a burden to you guys, hope you guys won't mind la (: The thing is, if I ever get caught, it would be for quite some time. Don't forget me okay? I'll look for you when I get out because I know very well the two of you are the ones who are willing to go through think & thin together. We have gone through quite a lot together & I love you two pootpoots ttm. takecare of yourselves if I'm ever not around, I'll be praying for you guys inside. Just hope I'll get through 8months, then I'll be free from all these bpc shit.
& one more thing to add, please psycho some people not to wait for me if I really go in, because nobody is supposed to suffer like I did if I turn out to be like some certain person when I come out. Choy*

- NAVINNNNNNNN
Iloveyou :D Thats all :D
Mwarcks.
He will leave my brains (: & my heart, trust me :D
Please fcuking drive safely, your girlf nearly died today because she wasn't holding at all when you suddenly flew forward :x
Heh, Love (:
PS : YOU BETTER TAG :D ♥

Replies To Tags (:
ღ , 微 D e b o r a h. : Hello Pootpoot. Do you realise how irritating you are?! peanut boy & pig girl. WTF?!?! I really cannot stand it already. I tell you ah. Honestly.... I...H..........A....T.........E.............My mother D: Ily la bitch ~ Heh.
- Shyan's ; (L) : Got my number then run ah?! Hahs. Don't know how text me uh?! Laugh (: Pei me more, before its too late (:
LEXIAN : Linked. Love (:
yangyang : BECAUSE I LIKE. BECAUSE JOVELL IS ZAI. UNDERASTAND ?!?! Heh.
Crystal : Lol (: Imy & your sis la dey.
Craigton : Lol.
jiehao : Lol. Ty. You too eh.
Huizhong : Alright (:
Qianhui : Now you know. When go ddr again ?! Laugh.
minjie : Fcuking text me please, 85243821. You gave me wrong number.
azrie : Birthday list? = gone :D Hahas :x
jingqi : Okay (:
MILLIELEE : What you want shit? Nabey :D Call you in school never answer.
jassen : Hi.
Covent : Spread, I have stopped schooling thanks to a few dogs. I'll miss the whole of 3e2 (:
jolene : FCUK YOU BITCH. IM FCUKING IN LOVE W YOU. WHY YOU DW KISS ME ! ;luv .
NAVIN :D : Nothing that has relationship to me is irritating :D

Jovell (:

Judith Lim Poot Poot :D

2010-02-28T02:59:00.000-08:00

There are a few things that should be brought to concern.
#1 - I did not go home yesterday :D Therefore Mummy insists to send me in ._. Dog right? Then I am supposed to go down to juvenile court on Friday ( Which I won't ) . Then everything is going to turn upside down ~ Where the fcuk can I stay for 8 months -.-
#2 - I have a boyf (:
#3 - No money.
#4 - Phone also no money.
#5 - No money buy cigarette.
#6 - I'm pimple-less & I eyebrow-abit-less ._.
Thanks to Deborah Koh Poot Poot :D

Judith.L

WHY

2010-02-26T07:52:00.001-08:00

WHY
WHY
WHY
WHY
WHY
WHY
WHY
WHY
WHY
WHY YOU GIVE HIM MY NUMBER D:

Sigh.a

I Really Want You Back So Badly.

2010-02-25T22:30:00.000-08:00

Ahh.

September post'09, so much memories.

I'm going to tell a story.

Credits go to Deborah Koh, here goes (:

Three years ago, I knew you over the internet. I used to talk to you everyday over the internet, then we started exchanging handphone numbers, texting & chatting till late night. Till one day, I mustered all my courage & met you. I still remember, you came up to my house to look for me, we had a wonderful conversation together. One day, I needed to make a trip to Indonesia for a few days, you took the extra effort to wake up early to buy breakfast for me. You insisted to accompany to board the train towards my destination. I wanted you to alight at your stop as I didn't want you to make the trip back alone.

When you left, I did not turn back to look at you. I find no explanation for my doing. I boarded the ship & thought of you throughout the journey. Teard flowed unknowingly. I then realised feelings have been developed towards you for the past moments spent together with you.

Loving you, feeling sad, hurt, depressed. Constantly tearing for your presence seems like a everyday process. After a heated argument with you, we lost contact. Every little thing we did & places we went brought along memories of me & you. Thinking of you the past years, have you thought of me? Or have you already forgotten me completely? Whatever you promised, I still remember, but you've forgotten everything yourself.

Three years ago, when it was my birthday, I opened a chalet. That night, we sat on a bench full of sand. Resting on your thighs, I hear you singing a certain chinese song. You still asked me if I remember that song. How could I possibly forget? However, on the last night, do you remember how much tears I wept for you, how much pain my heart felt? You displayed interest in one of my girlfriends.

Returning home from the beach, I was tired. Showered & fell asleep. You actually stayed up the whole night chatting with her & You used her phone & sent a blank message your own phone. Upon knowing this, I asked you, do you still love me? Your reply was :"Yeah, I just wanted to make friend with her." Rubbish. Because I love you, I chose to believe you. Your nonsense. After everything ended, all you cared was her. I became your past, your 'nothing'. You still called her & met at your house. Say what, study?! Who would believe?! Me. To make you jealous, I went up one of the guys house which you loathed & brought about undesirable situations. But yet, to my dismay, you didn't care. This cause us never to contact again.

Three years later, we met again in the internet & started having conversations all over again. Until a few days ago, we met again. & then again I fell in love with you, cried, felt hurt & depressed once more. I wanted to be the one playing with your feelings, but yet, you win, I lose. I'm nothing in your heart & will never be anything. I really don't know what you're thinking, I have totally no idea what to do next. Even if we quarrel over trival matters, I always have you in my interests. I really wish to tell you how this process is tormenting me. All I ask for is just to wake up & see your text, greeting me like you used to, just that short message is enough to put me through the rest of the day.

We quarreled once more. You say you're busy because you're moving house. I didn't think that way & instead my thinking is diverted to the fact that you're trying to avoid me. Out of a fit of anger, I told you to stop contacting me. I had the feeling that that is just what you would do. I wonder why I'm feeling the hurt return again.

I told myself I could not fall for you again, but why am I still in this desperate state? I thought you're already not the one who I once hated. I thought you're already not the one responsible for tearing again & again. I thought you have changed. I thought everything was for real this time. I thought, was just I thought.. I really want to let you know how much I really really miss you now.

Maybe, the song you sang to me three years ago was trying to put across that you're not worth my love, not wort my tears, not worth my hurt & sadness. However, everything have happened. The fact is that I really love you, I've cried for you, felt hurt & sa.d for you. What should I do now? I have so many things I wish to tell you, but once I see you, I forget everything. I must act like I don't care, like I don't even love you at all in front of everyone. I don't want to be your puppet. I only want to live my life free from agony, so would you please stop appearing once & once again? I may be conservative, but I'm not as strong & brave as you think. Nobody can deny I'm still a human being with feelings. I may not be your ideal girl of your dreams, & I may never have even a small place in your heart. I might still continue to be the childish girl in your mind.

I have so many questions to ask you, but in all my questions, there's one you can never answer. I know what kind of person you are, but have no idea why I would, without hesitation, choose to be your prey.

Are you thinking of me? I'm missing you. Our relationship.. Should be stopping here.

I'm very dumb, ignorant, naive, aren't I? I thought that if I were to put my heart & effort to the one person I love most, that person wil one day see it & recognise & understand my effort. Looks like I'm wrong. There's nothing much to this, just that its a little different from three years ago. I guess I can't even accept you as a friend now, because, from the start till everything ends, it was only me who contributed to the relationship all along. It's okay, it's only three years. I'll just have to learn not to be that stupid again next time (:

Don't persuade me to give up, because I don't know how to.

Don't ask me which part makes me love you so much, because I just be continuing like this.

Have I become the memory you'll yearn to remember?

I've been thinking, when the day comes where you'll finally take a look at me seriously, I'll be here, waiting.

It's just me being too ignorant, thinking that miracles will happen.

End - Of - Story.

---------------------

I saw him today, I wonder if he still cares. I couldn't help but stare, he wouldn't even look at me.

He loves her. I went home & cried. I lost him. Sigh.

I still love you, but not like I did before. The intense aching I felt isn't there anymore.

I still whisper you name but not as often as I used to, now it may be twice before the day is through.

I still hear your voice replaying in my mind, but it's fading now, soon it'll be silence I find.

I still long for you to feel your touch, but it's not like before, I don't dream as much.

I still think about you & wonder how you are, but my feelings have changed & they don't go as far.

I still feel you sometimes, hoping you're thinking of me, or maybe its just a little memory of how things used to me.

I still love you but it's just not as strong, because I'm letting you go now so we can both move on.

I still hear you say 'No one loves me like you do', but it's so hard to believe now after so much you've put me through.

You still have a piece of my heart because I always felt you here, now I'm hoping & praying that that will quickly disappear.

This will be my last goodbye, I have nothing elso to say, everything I feel for you, can now fade away.

If only everything was that easy, sigh.

Judith.L

&iloveyouso.

Remorse?

2010-02-23T22:11:00.000-08:00

Rotting at home, mother don't let me go out.
Sigh. Tsk. Lack of nicotine.
Changed my playlist to everything that reminds me of you.
I want find Deborah D:
I want find Jolene D:
I want find you D:
WTF ; you gave someone my number ?!
Ugh. I think I dying soon lor, keep sigh-ing.

He left his pace at one of the carriages, the wind in the subway is heavier than the memories.

The whole city has been waiting for me, there's still this feeling drifting about.

The only regret was the day you broke up with me, I could not stop bursting into tears.

Even if there are regrets, what can I do about them?

Will I be recovered? Even if I have gone through this pain, hurt & understood everything?

Used to rely on your shoulders, & now I am a wanderer in translation.

I'm madly in love with you, my dream have been shattered but have not forgotten.

No escape, the deeper I love, the more I get hurt, how should I love?

Used to believe that tomorrow is the future, no matter how bad the curcumstances are, I wouldn't wake up.

I love you through all the hardships till despair, my heart has been deeply hurt, never forgotten.

I no longer belong at this place, this place, my heaven in the start, turns to hell when everything ends.

&iloveyouso.
JudithL.

Love gave to you, I have no regrets.

2010-02-23T04:23:00.001-08:00

Since a long time since I updated.
Many things happened lately luh.
Had a nightmare just now, rather not say out the details.
I think I'm seriously madly in love with you, until now I still cry ._.
I'm such a failure.
Got suspended from school for a week.
For what? Teacher scold me, I scold back, pon class, tio caught, suspend.
Wtf la.
W/e.
Lazy reply tags. Lol, next time I post bah (:
(L) Sisters, don't blame me for not appearing, sometimes understand not that I don't want, is either I can't or.. you guys know de.
Sigh.
Yes I miss you.

JudithL.

Replay.

2010-02-08T19:15:00.000-08:00

Thinking aback when we got together, in our hearts we were saying forever.
So in loove, we were so in love.
Jealousy wasn't what we wanted, so we broke up, & when you looked into my eyes, I should have spoked up.
I would be crazy to say that we were perfect, & sometimes I wonder if it is worth it.
But no I see, how can you run from me?
Every now & then I walk pass your apartment, I have the overwhelming urge to walk in, & be in that plce aover again.
The way we laughed, the way we kissed, I never thought that I would miss.
& here it comes again, because I remember every word you said, it just keeps spinning around my head.
But it don't matter what I try to do, I keep on forgetting to forget about you.
& I don't want to think about you so much, all the things that we did & the way we touched,.
Just when I think about someone new, I keep on forgetting to forget about you.

Sigh, did not attend school today, mother reprimanded me again in the morning, severe mood swing.
Was really intending to attend school, & isn't it a little too late?
Everything isn't worth it.
You, you, you & you.
Make me laugh at my stupidity (:
Jovell Lim Jia Xin, You're a dog.

Replies to tags(:
imnotdeborah : Hello imnotdebora. Bitch ;mua. I know you love me, you know I love you :D
JOLENE SEAH : Yo Bitch. Slut here (: Loves.
Kerin : Fine, contact me alright?
Eilly : Lol :O Hi.
jingqi : Laugh, its alright la ~
-Sora : You text me, lost all numbers, lost phone.
- CLARAAAAAAAA ;D : Laugh, come out meet me soon la ):
Lincoln : You text me luh. Lost all numbers.
- Shyan's ; (L) : Laugh. TEXT ME TEXT ME. I lost all contacts.
YONGYAN : Heh. Excuses la you. Faster contact me.
J's : Laugh, Iloveyou. Fcuking miss you & your sis la.
Someone : You put someone who I know :x
Casper : Yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.?
Alex ♥ : Laugh, I lost all numbers, text me (L).
pb : Huh?
California : Hello (: Remember what I said :D
LeXian : HELLO (L) Cya around (:
Lydia, '♥ : Laugh, I also never step, put the number nia (:

&ilove-dyouso.

Emptiness.

2010-02-04T07:47:00.001-08:00

FUCK FUCK YOU.
THERES NO WAY I CAN BE IN LOVE WITH YOU.
NO WAY.

Sigh.

2010-02-04T05:46:00.000-08:00

Sigh.
So many things happen these two days, irregardless of whether happy or sad.
#1 : Yesterday I lost my phone.
- Nahbu. Take my phone never return whole family die. Messages, pictures, music, everything.
#2 : Damn shag in the morning today.
- Did something wrong I cannot say because Mummy's behind me.
#3 : Saw him.
- WHY. Shags.
#4 : No cigarette today.
- Complainged the whole day, Judith is irritating today.
#5 : Met Vanessa & Jolene today at JurongPoint. Did the most siasuey thing today.
- Went in the shop to see if he's there. Turns out to be not. Vanessa shamed me by say it out. Dared me to pierce my ear in the very same shop after making a fool of myself & leaving the shop. Went in, Vanessa did her dare by asking one of his friends for a stick of cigarette, Jolene did her dare by asking for his number. And guess what she said? "Judith want your number." Fuck.
#5 : Actually nothing liao la.

The thing about this post is that I just want to stress on Jolene shaming me.
I must not be affected by the sight of you, for I know this will not be the last.
Tags will be replied in the next post, so tag more.

You have to sow before you can reap, you have to give before you can get.

There are many things that we don't want happens but we have to accept it, things that we don't want to know but have to learn, & people we can't leave without but have to let go.

Goodbye is a painful way of saying I love you.

Yes I still do, but this has to stop, & I know it.

&ilove-dyouso.

Insanity. You left along with my happiness.

2010-02-03T19:10:00.000-08:00

Hello tiny earthlings.
Judith is back to announce that she has lost her damn nice LG touch screen handphone is lost.
So Judith will be changing number & updating everyone as soon as possible.
Feel sad for me, did not attend school today for I was partially sick, partially lazy & partially heartbroken.
Well, I can say the reason why I'm so sad is not only because I lost the phone.
It has so many contacts, pictures, music & more.
But what was most important is that message.
His message, his last message.
Sigh, I say I forgotten him, have I?
Sigh.
Sisters are loved, moodless today.

I don't give in no matter what, the useful things still haven't died.

Only you caused my broken body, dead dreams & lost heart.

If it's for you, this one body will fly, will rush to wherever you're at.

However, you say goodbye & goodbye to me.

I asked what are the reasons you don't want me anymore.

Tell me all about your confident facial expressions, along with sadness.

Even if I'm alright with everything & ask for a chance,

I don't like the cold you you return me; gratitude?

I ask the same day by day, will you please shut up?

You speak while knowing who you're talking to.

Now I'm constantly out of control while being alone,

At that spot, & that place, it's goodbye & goodbye.

What did I do wrong?

I say I'm leaving, I'm really going, to see if you can live well without me.

This is tedious, this is not going smoothly at all.

My heart's tragedy no way.

You're my heartbreaker.

&ilove-dyouso.

Limbu is here, ♥.

2010-02-01T04:37:00.000-08:00

Hi bitch!

Aww, im a lil prisoner aye.
You're a dog who sits outside my house.
HAHAHAHA, TAKE THAT FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT.
(: Im just joking.
7 MORE DAYS TO OUR 5 MONTH.
TILL THEN, SUCK ON MY TOES ON MY COMMAND LIKE A SEXY ROBOT!
Tsk, cant even know how to use fake eyelashes.
Only i do once, stick on perfectly :)

Girl, no matter what happens, you've got us.
You know it yourself.
& how much you meant to me.
As long as i lives, i wont let anyone hurt anyone of you.
This i promise you with my live ;]
& dont always get so down when relationships fail.
Every relationships got it's ups and downs.
You cant expect every of yours to have a happily-ever-after.
You are still able to control yourself.
Not like some bitch, she cant stop letting herself being fucked :)
I hope you know what's right & whats wrong.
Put down the past.
Be it, jurongsai, batok, or wherever it is.
Those guys, who once hurt you, be your history.
Start anew, new personality.
New thinking, & not let those son of a bitch get what they want.
You know what i mean.
You're a smart girl.
Thats why you're still loved by me.
I dont anyhow love people one ley.
Be honoured, slut.
You've more than what it takes to be a better person.
Love, its just 4 simple letters yet, till now.
No one knows, what can those 4 letters lead to.
A happy ending? Or a tragic love.
So, you have to brace yourself up.
& get armed and prepare to blast those mother fucker's faces.
Like L4D, boom boom boom boom. HAHAHAHAHA.
Anyway, you know you're still loved by us :)
Never ever ! Think that we're drifting.
WE WILL NEVER DRIFT, YOU WHORE!
You will always be in my heart, cause im a lesbian.
So, i'll see you tonight?
In my room, on my bed ;)
Anything must update me, be it relationship or friendship or family.
Cause i'll be thereeee. (:

Loving you, Deborah.

* Which mother bitch, not happy with whatever im writing.

Let me know :) I'll make my time free and play with you.

I Love My Deborah Because She's Pretty, Cute & Adorable.

2010-02-01T03:51:00.000-08:00

Sigh, crawled up from bed to meet Chinchin below my house.
I'm zai la okay, that goes without saying.
I wasn't late or what at all, that proves I'm a changed girl.
Reached after 7.15 am, smoked with Jolene, Vanessa, Chinchin & Jianfeng.
Went in school with that strong smell of cigarette, I know the teachers are pretending not to realise.
Texted with Weijie, he like damn sad la.
DON'T SAD LA WEIJIE, SMILE LIKE JUDITH, SHE HAS BEEN THROUGH MORE LA.

- You know, sometimes I really wonder if I should regret choosing him, whether there are many other better choices, whether the short moments of happiness is equivalent to the insane brought by his future actions. But then I realise, even if I regret, there's no way to turn back time, so I'll just have to live day by day with this effect from the cause I chose myself.

Well, Sengyang's friend the Ahboon texted me, Pamela's friend the Japanese guy texted me, I'm sort of traumatised.
Pon class from 11.30am till 1.30pm with Vanessa & Joey.
Had fun hanky panky in the toilet, chey~
Met Chinchin & Shaohui after smoking with Sengyang.
Slacked for a moment and went home.
Makeup-ed & left home for Jurongpoint actually meeting someone.
That someone flew to 5Head Jurongwest, left me there.
Met Deborah & Jolene & Vanessa & Jianfeng outside Deborah's house.
She locked up at home, like prison.
I love her la, she bitch (:
Sponsor-er of viceroy ice today!
Left after awhile to slack at the place where Xiaoandrew was once beaten.
Saw Fireboy & his friends ._.
Kaisiang & Navin came soon after, me, Vanessa & Jolene left for homeeeeee~
Me & Vanessa go jurong point where she changed her auntie clothes into her also auntie uniform. Saw the someone who dua-ed me today with his girlfriend.
Bought my cheese food & saw Pamela!
She with her friends then me send Vanessa to interchange then went back with Pamela then they pei me wait bus.
That's the end of today!

CONCLUSIONS.
'After my experience texting with Weijie, I conclude that he's a fcuking dua hai :D &

'Bebe the pretty lady is still as cute. &
'Vanessa still owes me the Egg food she so called sumpa-ed. &
'Jolene is a bitch. :D
*Beautiful, Intelligent, Tall [Other than this :x], Caring & Helpful.
Not true la. She very cb one actually :x Shhhh :O

&ilove-dyouso.

Judith Huat !

2010-01-31T05:39:00.000-08:00

I'm so fcuking zai can.
I attended school 5 days in the psat week.
Van & me do stunt on Friday.
Lucky la if not my third K form & hsa letter :x
My life is boring with my boring curfew.
Feel like I'm drifting apart from the three of you; my loves.
Oh its alright. I'll be fine, since I lost him, what else is there for me to lose (:
WEIJIE BULLY ME.
KILL HIM :D

Replies to tags (:
Vaney.L : I come back school liao hor! One week all the way go school hor! Where my sushi ?!?! Love :D
MMKY : Laugh, realised (: Hi ~ .
kath : Ehh. I no curfew confirm on you one (:
Junnnn : Lol.
- Shyan's; : LAUGH. Okay. Wait for your call la hor! Never contact me, boxim (:
Hojingci : You don't remember Judith D:
chen.FANGFANG : SMILES :D Judith si bu liao.
California : Hahahas. Hi !

&ilove-dyouso.

Nonsensical.

2010-01-25T05:19:00.000-08:00

Today.
Chinchin sent Judith to school.
Slacked & decided to go to school because I'm such an oh-so-good girl.
Got caught by Mr Razak, skirt & all those.
He confiscated my phone ._.
But returned it later in the day, thank goodness.
Did not go to class as did not want to face Miss Tracy, lazy go Pe & Chinese.
Went for recess bought the darn collar badge & went to find Mr Razak with the plastic.
Back to class & pay-ed attention.
Left before English lesson because the teacher so kb.
Laugh, went to collect my phone & Mr Razak said;" When you going in ah? Faster go in leh."
Jitao dulan bodoh. Bobian luh.
Slacked with Chinchin, Jolene, Vanessa, Liping, Lexian, Jianfeng, Andrew & Shaohui.
Chinchin sent me home in Joseph's bike.
On the way back to Huayi there to meet the rest, we buanged.
I'm not seriously injured, don't worry everyone!
Went to jurong point, ate my lunch, slacked & cab-ed home (:
Judith is zai luh.
Had much entertain with Jie's friend on her msn.
Fcuking laolan siah him :D
That's all I guess~

No one is going to be a substitute.

Nothing is going to happen until I've completely forgotten you.

No one deserves to get hurt like aI did.

&ilove-edyouso.

Taking Back My Love.

2010-01-24T07:55:00.000-08:00

I just realised my life is really boring.
I'm going to start replying tags once more.
I have totally no life.
Let's see, wake up, do the usual stuff.
Go down meet Chinchin, go Jurong.
Meet Anson & Jianfeng & Justin.
Anson get beaten by his father.
Oh my poor thing :x
Hmm, went up 679 carpark slack, Kaixiang & Lexian & Yunshen came up.
Somehow they all say Yunshen no respect, don't know & don't wish to know what happened.
Meet Yongyan Baobei & slacked with her while the rest proceeded up Anson's house.
She left & Chinchin sent Judith home :D
Its almost the same everyday, thats why I brand my life as no-life.
Ugh.
Disgusted.
Court two days ago gave me th don't know what shit & if I breach I'll be saying hello to Girls home of Hostel.
Thats damn saddening right? I know many will mourn for Judith (:
Currently texting a whole lot of people.
You.

What did I do but give love to you?

I'm confused as I stand here & look at you.

From head to feet, all that's not me,

Go ahead, keep everything, that's not what I need from you.

You think that you know, you;ve made yourself cold.

How could you believe them over me? I was your girl.

I'm out of control, how could I let go?

Don't you know I'm not materialistic?

So all these love I gave, take it all away.

You think material is the reason I came.

I'll give it all up, I'm taking back my love.

Replies to tags (:
zhuzhu's ♥ : Relinked (:
XiiaoZhong : Laugh. Crazy guy. X.Red ley. He already forgotten Judith lo! :x
yexiang: Laugh. Tyvms :D
- CLARAAAAAAAA ;D : Hahs, found it ler. Loveya. Clara change alr, Clara duwan me le D:
Melissa : Linked you :B
MILLIELEE : I NEVER BETTER LA EH ~
Raey : Jio me out soon la you :D Loves.
yang yang : Use your brain & think & think & think then you know le.
JavE : Hi.
Peishyan's : I'll be fine la eh~ I guess. Last long with Alvin if you're still together.
California : I make right decisions :D
chiahweeshan : Hello.
MMKY : Youare?
Casper : Never~ You text me luh !
Vaney.L : I'm trying la. I can de okay. Support me right? 10years ley~ :D:D Love.

&ilove-dyouso.

Judith Is Fine.

2010-01-14T05:10:00.000-08:00

Judith is fine (:
I'm not lying.

Sigh.

2010-01-12T06:48:00.000-08:00

What is it that I'm missing?
The lack of knowledge?
The lack of wisdom?
I know, I lack the ability to differentiate the difference between right & wrong.
Go ahead, just leave, can't hold you, you're free.
I gave you everything, cause you meant the world, so did I deserve to be left here?
What did I do but give love to you?
I'm just confused as I stand here & look at you.
I'll give it all up, but I'm taking back my love.
I have given you too much, I'm taking back my love.
Until then, Iloveyou.
I'm stronger now, there's significant improvement.
No more cuts, say hurray.

I won't be in your days anymore I guess, only remaining in your memories.

Just looking at you, my tears keep flowing.

As i watch you walking past, I’m still happy even though you still don’t know my feelings.

I should stop this and go.
I won't be in your days anymore I guess, I won'e be remembered either.

Just looking at you, I make memories alone.
Loving you is like having a beautiful wound.

I look at your splendid smile, but there's no way for me to laugh with you once more.

I’m withstanding the pain each day.

My heart is hurting in all these sad days, ‘I want to see you’ is playing on my lips.

Alone once again, crying for you.

Alone once again, missing for you

Baby I love you I'm waiting for you.

Notanymore.

JudithL.

Never Again.

2010-01-11T06:59:00.000-08:00

I guess I'm bound to face it one day.
Does it hurt? To know I'll never be there.
Bet it sucks, to see my face everywhere.
It was you who chose to end it like you did, I was the last to know.
You knew exactly what you were doing, don't say you simply lost your way.
She may believe you but I never will, never again.
Never again will I hear you.
Never again will I miss you.
Never again will I fall for you.
Never.
Never again will I kiss you.
Never again will I want to.
Never again will I love you.
Never.

JudithL.

Laughs.

2010-01-07T04:46:00.000-08:00

I don't know why, I think I'm going to continue waiting.
I may be a fool, but I guess I have no other choice, for this is what my heart wants.

Friends Are Loved!

2009-12-29T20:31:00.000-08:00

Yesterday.
Woke up aroung 12pm, prepared & bus-ed to Timah meet Weijie & Weihong (:
Weijie treat me 3hour lan la~
THANKYOU!
Tsk.
Then they accompany me wait bus ( Make them miss two bus ) then I reach home ~
Umm, then cooked my dinner, its nice okay.
Left house after preparing to meet Bebe & Jolene at JurongPoint.
Met an online friend too :x
Shortly after meeting, Diwei come down.
He's like fcuking tall can? ._.
Slacked around JurongPoint and Jolene buy some oh-so-cute girls boxers? -.-
Laugh~ Then we go carpark slack luh.
Jingsong called Diwei then him, & Darence come down meet us at carpark.
Laliang lo then Darence & Jingsong keep kpkb want go Bangala park.
Tsk~.
Played th swing there, Got fcuking lots blisters & Bebe fell.
Hohoho~.
Damn fun luh, so long never this fun liao.
Darence left as we proceeded to Safra play pool.
We kind of bua stunt like Ahhai loh.
Got screened on the way, we go back to carpark slack after buying cigarette & food.
It was about 5am then.
Around an hour upon reaching the carpark, I had a heated argument with Bebe over him.
Like what th fcuk luh -.-
Jingsong & Diwei at ther calm me down,
Jolene cry for duck.
After Bebe walked down from anger,
I cried too I guess.
Text-ed, Met up with her, & everything was resolved.
& these made me realise, nothing, I can hold on to forever.
& here's wen I make it a point, I'm going to stop.
No more continuing, what for make myself so shag over him.
Not worth it, I don't deserve it.
4th Jan, I'll still contact him.
& trust me, it will be th day where I should say Goodbye thr 6th & last time in my lifetime.
I love sisters~
Bwahahahahah. Tsk.

JudithL.

Not updating till 4th Jan.

2009-12-26T21:34:00.001-08:00

Lol.
I saw everything.

Fcuk La.

2009-12-24T02:50:00.000-08:00

Nabey. Why cannot see him on 4th Jan?
Why cannot write letter?
Why th judge so fcuk.
Why Singapore law so fcuk?
I beat people, I smoke, I spit salive, I scold people, I breaqk th fcuking law why dunwan catch me?
hen you people lock him up for fcuking 1year3month2week for what fcuk.
Smoke only mah.
So many fcuking people smoke why dunwan catch them?
Nabey, still don't let people write to him.
Knn everyone is human mah.
No friend will die de mah.
Cb if you all commit small crime then take away all your friends you all can leave meh?
Cb dog.
Knn.

Fcukzxc.

2009-12-22T02:38:00.000-08:00

CLINTON BABY D: ILOVEYOU. BEST WISHES INSIDE <3
Baby.
You promised me you wouldn't go in.
Baby.
I'm so sorry for not answering your call.
Baby.
I feel do fcuking guilty.
I shouldn't have slept.
I'm going to visit you soon my dearest.
I'll wait for you to come out okay,
I fcuking fcuking love you.
I won't hong outside.
I'll wait for you to be a freeman just like before.
I'll wait for you to spend every second with me.
I'll wait for you to return by my side.
Please trust me, I'll be there.
Takecare inside.
Anybody bully you I smack them.
Don't fight, be good inside.
Then can come out more okay?
I love love you.
I'll pray for you.
Iloveyou my dearest.

Hope should still be shining.

2009-12-21T15:37:00.000-08:00

Goooodluck to you Baby.
Iloveyou.
Please please please don't go in alright.
D:
Cry.

Gabriel Is Fat :D

2009-12-16T21:47:00.000-08:00

Wahahahas.
Gabriel is beside me now saying I'm lameee ._.
Who's lame-er manzxc :x
Bastard he who loves me, loves he who bastards me D:
IHATEDIEYOU D:
18's (:
Look forward to? Or not.

JuudithL.

Hopes wil be dashed, after all.

2009-12-12T15:26:00.000-08:00

Firstly, to the spammers.
We've talked about it in te phone I guess?
So lets stop this childish nonsense, we both happy.
What for? Never ask yourselves?
You can have your way & I have mine.
Why waste the energy for trouble?

Secondly, to my dearest Bebe.
I love you my dearest.
After, or rather even before I'm diagnosed with depression, I have already started cutting my wrist.
I know & everyone knows its stupid and childish.
All I can say is that this is just my way of relieving the stress & burden I feel.
I really did not want things to turn out this way either.
All I'd ever wanted is to see you smiling.
I'll try to stop regardless of the hurt I have recieved.
I guess its just karma, or in other words, retribution.
If I hadn't Done these, why would these come back?
Okay I don't know what I'm talking about.
Oh well, the point is that, I guess what goes aroung comes around.
I guess youve taken a look at my stomach too.
I'm really giving it my best to stop these child's play.
But it's the only way to divert the pain in my heart.
He's hurting me real bad.
Just need your love & understanding okay?
I really hope I don't go in.
Wish me luck (:

Thirdly, to you.
I will be waiting for 18th, & maybe I'll get an answer.
I don'tknow what to hope for, but, oh well.
I guess I can just wait silently.
No point making a fuss out of it right?
This is your song, only yours, your message tone, you know what song it is ;

Yeah, finally I realise I'm nothing without you.

I was so wrong, forgive me.

My broken heart, like a wave.

My shaken heart, like the wind, vanishes like smoke.

It cannot be removed like a tattoo, I sigh deeply as in the ground is going to cave in.

Only dust is only left piling up in my mind.

Yeah, I though I wouldn't even be able to live one day without you, but somehow I managed to live on longer than I thought.

You don't answer as I cry out I miss you as I hope in vain for an expectation that are now dashed.

What is it about the person next to you?

Did she make you cry?

Dear, can you even see me?

Or did you forget me completely?

I'm worried, uneasy, because I can't get close to you or try to talk to you.

I spend long nights alone, erasing my thoughts a thousand times.

If we pass by each other on the street, act as if you didn't see me.

If I keep thinking of my past memories, I'm afraid I would want to look for you.

Always be happy with her, so I wouldn't have a different mindset.

Please live well, disregarding my jealousy.

You should be like that bright sky, like that white cloud.

Yes, you should always smile like that as if nothing happened.

I hope your heart feels relieved, please forget about me & live on if I cause you pain.

My tears might dry completely one day.

As time passes by, it would hurt less as if we didn't meet at all.

Hope that you would bury the promise that we will be together forever baby, I pray.

Don't look back & leave, don't look for me again & live on.

Because I have no regrets loving you, trying to take only the good memories.

I can bear it in some way, I can stand it in some way.

You can be happy like this, & I become duller by day.

But this as all I'd could ever for wish for, for you to be happy.

Boy, I cry, you're my all, say goodbye.

My love, dont die, you're my heart, say goodbye.

Lastly, to all.
Judith have lost her phone at Boon lay.
So if anyone recieves any crazy messages, it wouldn't be me.
I'll be informing everyone regarding my new number very soon!
Keep in contact :D
Oh ya, Clara and your sisters, if your brother decides, We'll might not ever meet again.
I love you guys , you all have really given me a great time.
Big thank you for sponsoring cigarettes, Bebe & Joseph.
Big thank you for accompanying me all the way in my darkest nightmare, Bebe & Joseph & someone I have no idea who.
Big thank you to all who cared.
Big apology to Ex audition couple Kazhua, I'm never good from the start, I shouldn't have let you trust me.
Big apology to Ahyang, I'm not good anough for you, stop waiting and go for your happiness. My eart stays with one only.
Big spology to Mingzhou, I didn't keep my promise, I've let you down, but this can't be helped. I'm sorry for giving you false hope.
Big apology to Xiaoandrew, I didn't want to avoid you on purpose, its just that you don't understand certain stuff.
Big apology to Wilson, I'm sorry for not honouring my promise, I should have listened.
Big apology to Bebe, Weiting, Minjie, Jolene, Liping, I really didn't want to cut my hand anymore.
Big apology to Mummy & Daddy, I love you guys, I will show you all I'm not worth to be inside, give me a last chance & I will prove it.
Big apology to anyone I rejected, I love him & him only.
Bit apology to myself, for causing more & more harm to my body, for not loving myself.
Big goodbye to all,
Sisters,
Brothers,
Friends,
Everyone who cares,
You guys are loved very, very much.
I apologise for being ugly,
I apologise for being useless.
I apologise for being looked down upon,
I apologise for being stupid.
I apologise for waiting,
I apologise for wanting you so badly.
I apologise for having depression,
I apologise for having attitude problem.
I apologise for not being up to your standard,
I apologise for not being your ideal girl.
I know you must be thinking I'm think too much once more, oh well.
Sorry.
I know it doesn't help one bit, after all, a plain sorry cannot change anything in your sense,
It was my fault right from the start.

JuudithL;
Day 3, awaiting 18th Decenber.

Clara`s Here , Hohohoo^^ .

2009-12-05T20:58:00.000-08:00

Yohs` , Judith finally let me update her "dearest"blog , hoho :D
Haaaaaazzz , She ton-ed my house for 3 days yeah :D , but too bad im absented yeah.
But nehmind ! , she tonn-ing again soon , Damn happy this few days yeah(:
& to luvszx ? , You this B!tch , fcukkkk offf niah ;D , This nort your blog , so dun comment on others, comment on yourselves first lah please , You want go seduce your on man you go seduce , dun tok c0ck , put your "crime" on others niah!,dog jiu shi dogs xD.
& to ******** , Please fcukkk off you this B!TCHYY . You Horh, Dun tok thoosee "disgusting" thing in JUDITH`S blog , Cos you have no rightt to tag niah . So you just fcukk off , Don't comment on others,You want comment, Comment on yourselves first niah(:
Kaykay ! , The happiest thing is Judith&Clinton` , Patch-ed . They firstly couple , than break,than patch,than break, & now ! , Patch-ed . Wish themmm last forever kay ! , & horh, JUDITH! , Yourh present horh,With my auntie car , Dun say kaobei, Dun teach me bad girl ! , Don't say cheebai oso ._. , ie guaikia:3 , Don't teach bad me :P , haaaz . Kaykay , i guess this is a long post niah ? , kaykay ! , ILOVEYOUH Judith ;D , Now i think judith posting ? , Kaykay ..
You must miss meh kaykay ! , Cos Mon-Wed going camp , MISSMEEEEE ! :X
Goodbyes, - CLARAAAAAAAAAAAA ;D Here niah ! , Rmb me ! Rmb me ! ;D , Luff dai !

JUDITHLIMHERE:D
Siao. I everyday see you how to miss you -.-
Me go your camp find you :D
& your fuck-ing bro keep sleep _l_
Nb.
I also never say want to post you anyhow laa~! :x
Bye :D
Not replying tags till further on,
cause their computer like got prob _l_
Assssss._.
:D
5.39pm.
I saw something I really regretted seeing.
I really didn't want to know this.
Maybe Im thinking too much bah,
but how to remove that thought when its right in front of your eyes?
God,
And its a little late for explanations,
there isn't anything that you can do.
I just don't understand why you must do this to me.
Who's making who jealous?
Who's making who think so much?
I will never never betray you my love.
But if you want, I also lan lan alrights.
Oh, whatever.
How could I know that only in my eyes its all good and everything I'd ever wanted.
Now that you're showing your true colours baby now I know that we weren't meant to be.
Goodbye my love.
JUUDITHL :D

Deborah's teh pua ;D

2009-11-29T04:29:00.000-08:00

ILY JUDITH
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Hello fucking bitch.
Its been ages since i last saw you, today i finally met you again.
I hate you so much, cause you always dont want me.
Want other people ):
You freaking break my heart you fucking piece of shit.
How could you do this to me ?
I tiong xim you one ley, yet you hurt me, hong me ):
So hurting.
But when i meet you today, there was alot of changes in you.
I was so devastated when i heard some stuff about you..
But it will never change the point of view i have towards you & you know it;D
So JLMH, you're mother fucking mine & you better resign to your fate.
& suffer under my control, you fucking bitch.
You love me right, i know :D
I love you too ;shy .
Whatever thing happen to you, i'll stand by you.
Whoever wanna touch you, have to go through me.
Because your blood runs in mine veins on o8th`s October 2oo9.
You are my little sister, & i'll protect you forever (:
Dont hurt yourself anymore understand bitch?
Anything that is bothering you, im just a phone call away.
Feel free to call me up 24/7.
Well, it only depends if im asleep or not ;x
But i'll not leave you, even though you're a noob.
I know you're getting noob-er ( if thats even a word ) each day, but i'm still here right. (:
SEE ! Deborah so good (:
I love you so much, & forever well.
I love chuszxc . LOL :)

& to JOEY ANG, if you see this you better take this seriously to whatever im typing.
JUDITHLIM, is my zharbor.
You buay ke yan her, COME FIND ME.
You got my fucking number & know who the fuck i am.
After that fucking punch i gave you, you still want laolan with my friends?
You sure bo, siao lian eh. -rolls eye-
I dont care how fucking big fuck you are now or whatever.
Just try me, again if you want. ;)
TRY ME LA DEY. _l_ <3>

{L}Your Mother ;
Deborah.K

JUDITHL HERE:D

Okay, I'm at Ahyang's house again..

Few days ago had a problem with Joey.

Somehow she kind of jiomeng Wilson G.Baobei?

Then she sibei sialan?

Then she put BoonLay?

Then she bomb us?

So ended up 1on1 with her, Jolene G.Sister 1on1 with her G.Jie Christine?

Jolene suffered a few scratches?

Me got blue black at my eye cause she fucking cb.

She tell me relax then box me.

WHATTHEHELL?!

Jolene staring at me post ._.

Trying to persuade me to let her update her damn blog.

Ughhhhh.

I very sad because of ******* & **** & ********.

I very sad D:

I won't contact you le.

Its for the best bah.

Haiyoooo.

I miss you badly D:

I also don't know why.

Yes they are males & always the one who always cause problem -.-

Ohwells! Bebe is back my side (:

LOVEDIEYOU! :D

Bebe is so bhb :D

This is a lame quiz don't know steal from which blog ._.

#1 Last person you hanged out with? : Jolene, Bebe, Ahyang (:

#2 Last person I texted? : Minjie G.Darling.

#3 Last person in the car with? : Charmaine & Zidan.

#4 Last person went together to the movies? : Mummy :x

#5 Last person went to the mall with? : Jolene, Bebe, Ahyang (:

#6 Last person talked on the phone with? : Jeff G.Bro.

#7 Last person I commented? : Clinton.

#8 Talking on the phone with? : No one.

#9 Ever kissed someone on your top friends list? : Bebe, Jolene, Liping :C

#10 Been searched by cops? : Yeah.

#11 Been suspended from school? : Not yet ._.

#12 Sat on a rooftop? : Yup.

#13 Been pushed in a pool with clothes on? : Yes. Yeongkhen. Phone spoil.

#14 Broken a bone? : Nope.

#15 Shaved my head? : Never.

#16 Still a virgin? : You think leh? :x

#17 Played a prank on someone? : Everyday..

#18 Shot a gun? : Toy gun :D

#19 Donated blood? : No.

#20 Eat or drink? : Drink.

#21 Serious or funny? : Funny.

#22 Beach or mountains? : Beach.

#23 Die in fire or shot? : Shot.

#24 Sun or moon? : Moon.

#25 Winter or fall? : Winter.

#26 Left or right? : Left.

#27 Black, white or coloured? : White.

#28 Want to get married? : Yes :D

In the last week have you ;

#29 Kissed someone? : Yes.

#30 Been hugged? : Yes.

#31 Been poked? : Yes.

#32 Cried? : Yes.

#33 Gotten into a fight? : Yes.

#34 Told someone you love him/her? : Yes.

#35 What did you dream last night? : Sex. Fake :x

#36 Where did you sleep last night? : Ahyang;s house :x

#37 Is Michael Jackson innocent? : No.

#38 Do you have many friends? : Tons :D

#39 Do you feel comfortable aroung them? : Maybe? Depends.

#40 Are you racist? : Bangala & Indian.

#41 Vegetarian? : No.

#42 Best way to start a conversation? : Hello.

#43 Rock or Hip-Hop? : Hiphop.

#44 Metal or punk? : No idea...

#45 Reggae or rap? : Rap.

#46 How much make up do you wear? : Little bit :D

#47 Colour of hair? : Black. White. Going to be fucking red.

#48 Jolene or Ahyang? Jolene!

#49 Bebe or Ahyang? Bebe!

#50 Bebe or Jolene? Ahyang!

Okay I lazy update liao.

Next time then reply tag kay :D

JuudithL.

Never Accepted, Never Again.

2009-11-18T02:23:00.000-08:00

Date : 18.11.09
Time : 6.35pm
Venue : Ahyang's house
So sorry for not updating for a long time.
Just realised a few stuff.
Few updates on my left hand once more;
Around 60 cuts, adding on a game of tic tac toe with Sanji ( Zhenghua one )
Shag-ed.
When will I wake up?
Don't think its possible for anyone to replace you.
You don't love me anymore, that is a fact.
Wishing that memories can be replayed, that time can rewind so that I can indulge in thr non-existant happiness.
Missing every second and moments we have spent together, even though they misght only last for a short while.
Too difficult to forget, too late to regret.
& I stand in front of the mirror telling myself I'm happy, yet tears flow down unknowingly.
Wondering when I could laugh genuinely again.
I'll never be able you forget your presence and you'll never acknoledge my existence.
Hopeless as can be, I give up.
& my dearest Ping, don't know whats getting on her.
She seems frustrated these few days.
Wonder what she's thinking.
Sisters, whatever happens, I will always be here for you guys.
My birthday was quite terrible too, though.
Left house on 8th November after a heated argument with my Mum.
She's thinking of sending me to bpc again.
Left for TamanJurong after tearing for a few moments downstairs my house with Wendy.
178-ed over to Taman and met MingJie G.Daddy at TamanJurong CC.
Slacked for awhile while MingJie kio cigarette from me :x
Gary came soon after and we talked cock, sang song, played game ._.
Saw MingXiong at TamanJurong with Yinsin uh.
Life was boring as we lorry-ed to superbowl in TianJie's lorry?
Watched him and his girl and her sisters bowl.
Saw Yinsin and Gabriel, Her boyf.
Don't know why they got problem, you know.
Different groups.
So there was around 5 of them and I'm not sure how many of us.
I only remember scary HongXiang was present.
Met my longlost bro Hankuan.
Missed him like shit.
Walked back to 399 and slacked there.
It was around 11pm then.
Dearest Ping arrived at the scene and she somehow managed to psycho me to return to BukitPanjang.
Reached there around 11.45pm.
There were them, as usual.
Alphabetical order,
Astronaut, DeEn, Deshaunt, Emson, Jason, MingZhou G.Darling, Thomas ( Not sure how to spell :x ) & still got I don't remember.
Went 7-11 with Ping she buy mashed potato feed me & I go do stunt.
Slack-ed awhile, because I didn't want to see someone's face, moved to another corner.
They left for 163, if I'm not wrong, and we stayed ant a block near Petir station?
Brian G.Kor came down with liquor for me, just for me (:
Ps-ed him and walk-ed to DeEn's house with Ping.
Deshaunt met us there.
Sanji called in the middle of the night ._.
Slept and left around 2pm.
Met ZhangTeng and got my carebear, met Peishyan and MinJie G.Darling and got my lighter.
I love them, thanks many.
WeiTing ang Jon gave me a lighter too!
Strangely, the first one to greet me happy birthday was X.Victor.
Followed by these nice nice people;
Ping, Bebe, Kellie G.Dearest, Lincoln G.Di, Peishyan G.Sister, ZhangTeng, Jie ( Real Blood Sister ), Jolene G.Sister, Clinton, Brian G.Kor, JunJie, DeEn, Emson, MingZhou, Astronaut, Sanji, ZhiWei, YiLin G.Stead, AhYang G.Baby, Renee G.Mei, Gary, MingJie, Hankuan, Nazem, Yeongkhen G.Di, MinJie, ZongHan G.Daddy, Shengjie, Millie G.Dabian, Yongyan G.Baobei, Kerin G.Sister, Wendy, Whiten, Jinyao, Jason, Clara and not forgetting those in my tagboard, friendster, tagged and facebook I have not mentioned.
A big thank you for remembering my birthday, you guys are cherished!
Lovediesisters,
JuudithL.

Replies To Tags
I'mPeishyan: Noupdates?! Updates soon leys! (:
I'mPeishyan: Hellos, ! (: Birthday soon ehys. 2more days! (:
AkuPeishyan, !: Asiehyyyyyyy! Old liao ahs. HappyBirthdayAgains!
- Updated :D Come out meet me laaaaa.

MIKOOO: YOH JIEH JIEH!
MIKOOO: HELLO !! stay chio
MIKOOO: HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!
MIKOOO: BOOOOO!!!!!! MIKO LOVE LOVE YOU LOADS <333>
- Er? Yo? :x

CLARAAA(:: H3ll0 Sis ! (: , Hhahaha . Finally update blog liao wor ! ^^ . Hahah . see me taq you so many
CLARAAA(:: (continuing) i will study hard de leh ! (: . Hahahah.Hope you will be with ******* soon.Ilyilyily<3
CLARAAA(:: Tag yahs again .. okok.. go lan . we see who trash who . i use hack lor(: , laughs !
CLARAAA(:: please tell me ley
CLARAAA(:: the passworrrd .. toking on fone wif you now . laughs:D
CLARAAA(:: CLARA here , : Isabelle(Passer) you huanlo ? , so post what your problem ? dun
come and bark here .
CLARAAA(:: ( continue) come here bark when no one wants you in . fcuk off doggie(:
CLARAAA(:: Sister your tagg!(:
Claraaaaa;D: ;D , Tagged Sister!(:
CLARAAA(:: Hello ! Someone birthday coming soon wor !^^
CLARAAAAAAAAA:D: [ XavierKORKOR] you than grow up lurhs ! my money . if not i steal your slippers next time ^^
CLARAAA:D: Wows. soon birthday le wor! one year older ,tagged and relinked!:D
CLARAAAAA:D: HAPPPPPYYYY BIRTHHHHDAYYYYYY JIEHHHHHHHHH!!!! Repeat : HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!!
Clara (:: TAGGGEEEDDD^^
CLARAAAAA:D: WOOOTT >< , Bloggg dead . LOL!!!!
CLARAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA:D: LAUGHHHH! TAGGGGGEEEDDD ! Tell me your pw lo
i everyday help youh update , laughs . LOL!
CLARAAAAAAAAAA:D: LAAAA.Making yourh blog alive ;D , haaa.Tagged!
CLARAAAAAAAAAA:D: Okayyyyhhhh:x, HAaaaahaaaa. now youh come in why not update ? O: , !
- Yala, sis. Melovedieyou(: Where my present?

YiLin's: Stead! Get well soon uh, tkcare okie.
- Laugh. Find one day, jio me out :D

whoareyou: <3>
Menotxiaox: Errr, are you judith ? MeLoveYou.
LIMPEIXIAOX: (L):D Ehh-.- who th fcuking helll are you ? pcb.
xiaox: -.- me dc animore-.-
- Hahahs, the days.

Rachelcheeliming says,: So many people know you mah, (:
- Where got? Siao.

♥ B/abykellie: tmd always want jio you come out no reply or ans my calls de. wahah, miss you la sis ! tctc. (:
B★KEL.: SISTER ! when your bdy? missyou laa <3
B★KEL.: Sister, holiday alr. faster come out ley. text me (:
Babykellie.: Sister ! update update.
- Today me got time you dunwan find me kay! D:

Isabelle(Passer): Eyer retain still post so big, show off. Hao lian about what sia?
- Aiyo. Me want you huanlo so much -.- Buey ge yan call me kan laaa, sot de.

aiai: ;D still rmb me hehe ;D Takecare
- Ofcourse(: Alex? Contact me soon!

Hi: Hi u play audi? What's ur ign? Just asking.
- Yeah, icyscorpiooo (:

Tiny.L: aiyo wht happen wor .
Tiny.L-Isabelle(Passer): she post big big got your problem meh ?
- Aiyo. Nothing much uh. People sot de we mai huanlo :D

jeanice: JUDITH! tagtag (: hmmms , holiday meetup leis . haha . takecares ah , loves .
- Yupyup. Call me (: 84235061.

CHAR: JUDITH CONTACT ME REAL SOON YEAH A VERY BIG THING HAPPEND
- Called, no answer.

jingqi: hey judith(: Chill, don't care all this people lahh, my blog also got people come *****. don't care!
jingqi: They just felt helpless or despo for anything, don't care, cheerup kays!
jingqi:
- Yupyup (: Call me go out soon eh.

Renee: Tagged, tkcare.
- Thanks! Anything call me ;D

(L):D: <33>
- You're?

jiehao: free meet up yea tc
jiehao: Happy bleated birthday tc!
- Alrights.

Chloe.: sist! iloveyou lahhs , MUACKS! XIAOX! you have a problem me loving judith?
HAHAHAHA
Chloe.: diam la xaiver.
- Iloveyousis. Ineedyou. Imissyou. Don't leave me!

yang yang: ehs...y yr tag recently so pessimistic 1 sia.?cheer ups^^
yang yang: lols...uii fat le sia...omg...anyways...happi bdae 2 uii!!!
- Okok luh. FUCKYOUHARDHARDYOURERIGHTBESIDEME:D YOU THINK YOU VERY SKINNY MEHSXC D:

Deborah{♥}: FCUK ! Judith's mine . knn fk off .
Deborah{♥}: ccb not happy come only .
Deborah{♥}: 83301811
Deborah{♥}: fking bytch .
Deborah{♥}: LOL .
Deborah{♥}: JUDITH I LOVE DIE YOU .
Deborah{♥}: HAHAHAA. Fake la sis, anw. meet up soon .
Deborah{♥}: what happen uhs .
Deborah{♥}: msg me laa .
Deborah{♥}: you never msgg , noob. HAHAHA audi i lvl 17 liaos :3
{♥}Deborah, <3>
{♥}Deborah, <3>
{♥}Deborah, <3>
{♥}Deborah, <3>
- Sis, please contact me, please.

chen.FANGFANG: hey hey mummy! relink yeah. sorry for the trouble. hehe, take care (: CHEERS
chen.FANGFANG: sorry sorry, this is the link = =" thanks yeah
chen.FANGFANG: hey hey mummi! happy birthday! cheers! SMILE!
- It's alright, daughter :D

Kerin(=: Sister , Long time no see le!Miss you worrs. Miit up soon kays?
- Waiting for your call (:

XavierKORKOR: do you knw tat ur name at mani place alr smelly liao!!! wake up la dun be like a PLK
- Ey fuck. Come nia hor.

jolene: hello sist , jio me out again someday . like today (: someone's birthday coming uh ..
- You whole day at home -.-

kenneth: HEY JUDITH! TAGGED
- You which kenneth?! :x

gary: lol dumb dumb =D
gary: happy bdae takke carre =D
- You then dumb luh! D:

CALIFORNIA: HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!!
- Tyvm :D

JINGER: HEY ! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU ! BD
- Thanks (:

HoonHui: happybirthday jiejie.Hahas.(:
- Thanks.

ROSIE: Hello. Relink . Tq (:
- Kay.

Huizhong: Relink ty (:
- Kay.

&ilove-dyouso.

Accused

2009-10-25T07:48:00.000-07:00

I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
I seriously never shoot D: I seriously never shoot D:
IREALLYNEVERSHOOTLAAAAS D:

Prawn, HaiQiang, WeiXiong.
Please believe me D:

OI CCB FKING ZHABOR STOP INSULTING ME.
YEAH YOU C'S GANBABY.
FIND MY FUCKING NUMBER DONT DOG LA HOR NBCB.
ME JUDITH LIM NUMBER NOT DIFF FIND.
I EXPECT A STOP TO THIS NONSENSE AND AN APOLOGY.
WAKEUP YOUR FUCKING IDEA.
KNN.

Revealing My Secrets.

2009-10-24T04:56:00.000-07:00

JUDITHLIM RETAIN SECONDARY 3 EXPRESS HUAYISECONDARY :X
Laugh, my mother, don't know why she suddenly let me use laptop.
Think her head got problem, but in a good way eh?
Things get messed up, great news is that I've forgotten you.
*Happy face :D
You, I guess after what has happened you'll just never be able to believe me again, will you?
I don't know what to do for you to believe I had nothing to do with that.
Even if you don't, I'll always remember you this very, very good friend of mine.
Always waiting for your trust.
& You, You're self centered and always in a bad mood.
You don't care about my feelings and are harsh towards me.
I wonder why I believed you in the first place and I truly regret now.
You are no better from C, or rather, worst.
I fucking hate you, your behaviour and attitude disgust me.

I'm so bored now, I'm sick.
I have running nose, throat infection, cough, sore throat, fever 39.6 degrees D:
Sick sick, who is there to take care of me!
I need to smoke D:
Faints, will update next time my mummy decides to let me use the computer again (:
She's not watching the 'Love' on channel 8 :x
I feel like a stalker, shh D:
Bytheway, Clinton is sick.
He say he want buy push up bra for my birthday.
What a bastard eh.
& to that ganbaby of his,
stop contacting him because people already say you irritating so please fuck off,
stop insulting me and judging my actions and my love for Clinton before,
unhappy take my number from him & I'll entertain your antics.
Don't dog behind computer (:

Replies To Tags((:
xiaox: Thanks for th tag, i knew its you. takecares too.
Xiaox: Tagged (: takecares.
- Huh ._. Idontknow what you talking :x

CLARAAA :D: Hahahas:D , Yupps . Takecares & loveyahs , hmms sat and sun bahx . mum not at hme , Laughs
Clara^^: Taggiess:D
Clara^^: Sat bahs , Ermmm 1 + like dhatt .. stay at hme okays ! LOL
CLARAAA :D: call me lurhhs , when you see this:D
CLARAAA:D: RELINKED:D
CLAAAAARAAAAAAAA:D: Heys sister ! Told yous update just now , Oso kena caught by mum D:,Update & Relinked & tag me :X
CLAAAAARAAAAAAAA:D: Here's the link X:
CLARAAA - r: Mai advertise in judith's blog laaa . -.-
- Study hard la you! ;x Keep asking for my password. Next time go lan, my audi trash you! Hahah (:

-/!Rachelchee: Wa, my jiejie so famous uh! LOL.
- Huh? where got famous? What happen? ;x

MIKOOO: RELINKED JIEH!
MIKOOO: HELLO! JUDITH JIE! ^^
- Alright :D

Yexiang: HELLO ! judith (: . just pass by .
- Hello (: How you all le ?

YOngyan: your number stilsame uh?
- Yups (: Feel free to contact me uh :x

Peishyan: Tagged , cheerup babe .
I'mPeishyan: Noupdates?! Updates soon leys! (:
- Laugh, update liao lar :D

BooN: don't say i never tag you..
- Rofl, bring marker liao lar me :D

passerbyyyyyy.: tagged. dont givb up h0pe 0n euur liife. please stayy str0ng and happii. euu kn0w that al0t 0f ppl
passerbyyyyyy.: l0v and care f0r euu. s0 d0nt disapp0int them. n0 matter whad happened iin th past, just let iit g0.
passerbyyyyyy.: and studyee hard.g00dluk in euur eoy and takkacre. stay str0ng. god bless.
- Thanks for the concern, although its easier said than done uh..

jolene: hey sist , much loves ! tags ♥
jolene: hello sist , im here :d
jolene: hey sist , much loves
- Ily ily ily! :D

Deborah {♥}: Last lonq with haiqianq loves
Deborah{♥}: 070909;D melovedieyous. me believe you not sk :} muacks.
- Dumb dumb sister, dua hai uh. Thanks sis, me really really never shoot them, hais.

yang yang: dun tink too much jiu can smile geniuinly le lors
- Yaya -.-

jiehao: tagged:D
- Thanks.

babykellie: Sis (:
babykellie: sister holiday comecome out slack eh! imy );
babykellie: SIS (: update .
- You jio laaa :D

CALIFORNIA: Hello ! (:
- Hellllo :D

jy: UPDATE LAR!!zu di jiu shi ZU arh so lazy to update~
- Computer spoil la dey! Hahah.

dalston: Tags (=
- Tyvm ^^

Huizhong: Darling want go out ?
- Sure, give me a call alright? (:

gary (hyss): eh when ur chalet?
- Canceled. JudithLim book bu dao. Mother say very mafan. Celeb other way, contact all of you again :D

gary(taman jurong): ehhh tagged ^^ hahas
- Lol! Tyty (: You two gary so cute ! :X

&ilove-dyouso.

Ignorance Is Bliss.

2009-10-04T08:08:00.000-07:00

Siann laaaa.
Hope we can still be friends uh.
Tyring hard to forget the both of you,
Never thought this day would come for me.
Not going school tomorrow.
Dont ask me why,
I cant concentrate either so ya..
Met MinJie Darling slacked.
HaiQiang came along.
Slacked.
MinJie had to go, therefore left me and HaiQiang.
Did nothing, literally.
MinJie came a few hours later.
Then one hour plus she gone again.
Slacked few more hours go wait bus for tuition.
Thanks loads for accompanying me for 6 solid hours & wait bus.
Much appreciated(:
Reached tuition ShengJie sponsor one stick,
Noel Kor sponsor 4 stick,
Thanks many, guess you all can see me sooooo shag ._.
Played sparkles after tuition Darren sponsor.
I know my brothers & sisters love me :x
Shit, my attitude problem is overcoming me, sorry if i offend anyone these few days.
When will I ever smile genuinlly again? I ponder.

Replies to tags((:
Xiaox: nv come my blog tag D: Anw, tagg (:
--Me dont have link mah, now have le, will tag de la(:

chiahweeshan: tagged judith!(:
--Thanks.

Derrius :D: Lols . Don't need everyday tag larhs , hahas .
--Hahas, LDY :x Hope can remain friends, takecares :D Tag more often laaa.

-/!Rachelchee: HEHE, I won't one lah, i super guai one, (:
-/!Rachelchee: Laughs, you know de wei uh?
--Good then good, hahas, not I know him, is he know me :x

CLARAAA :D: Seeyahs soon toos ^^ , maybe next time i sneak out find yous , Prooo meee <3>
--You say de ah, I'll be waiting! You have my number (:

Jeanice: okay
--Laughs, make it snappy (:

&ilove-dyouso.

Disregarding.

2009-10-03T07:09:00.000-07:00

You are determined to solve a financial issue that has been bothering you for some time. If the opportunity arises for you to join in a business partnership, you are advised to go for it without hesitation. Thus you might be able to improve your family budget quickly and with little effort. Consider your loved one's opinion first.
~
Trying real hard eh.
Today mid-autumn festival (:
Met ShengJie for tuition,
Darwin Kor was late as usual.
Studied real hard, max concentration eh.
This is rare, appreciate it (:
ShengJie actually want accompany us go Jurong East library study want.
The he last minute dont want.
Si dua hai. Knn.
Me and Darwin then mrt-ed there.
Studied for about one hour plus & saw Gavin cousin there with his scary friends ._.
Went to NTUC buy chips and water then went to a block to intentionally study.
Did not in the end, talked cock with Darwin.
Long time since we spent quality time together.
Bus-ed home takemoney from mother then go eat, buy lantern & candle.
Me and Darwin go 283 eat saw heng heng :x
Scary.
Met HanMing then went to play candle.
Overall, had an enjoyable day with Darwin, however,it still keeps resurfacing.
Only have myself to blame.
Love you Darwin Kor :D

You finally said it out,
Actually, you don't love me anymore.
Why must you look down?
You know this joke can't fool me.
However, this isn't a joke,
It is running away from the reason why you left me.
I've finally said it out,
Actually I really love you, but never seriously said so.
Maybe it's my fault,
Only keeping my concern for you in my heart.
Don't ask me why,
Because I love you, that is my reason.
Nothing really needs to be forgiven,
My smile might seem a little forced.
As you know, I can always pretend not to be suffering,
Don't want to see you so tired although you might not care.
Wishing for you to give me one more opportunity,
Quivering, holding on to my hand,
Holding on to what is only wind.
What else can I do, you don't love me anymore.
I've always loved you, Is that not enough?
What more can I do, so that you won't leave me?
I know that you have no intention to continue caring for me,
Wholeheartedly wanting to leave me.
& I finally realise,
Much to my dear friends' relief.

Replies to tags((:
Derrius :D: Yala ! Hahas
Derrius :D: Tag la Tag la ~ >.>
Derrius :D: Opps ;x , press too fast . But i now got tag marhs Hahas . You also seldom tag me >.>
--._. D: ): >= Sad. You want me everyday tag also can..

Clara ★™: Lax arhs(: , Loveyahs & takecares
Clara(: Finally you're back , misses
Clara(: Loveyahs
Clara (: - mjxD , mai spam larhs -.-" wan spam come my blog spam narhs!, -.-
Clara(: Takecares , You'll be fine , Loves and tagged
--Laughhs. Girll. Seeyou soon eh.

Jeanice: hellos (: tagged . don say i never tag you & takecares .
--Hahas, thanks, see you anywhere soon (: Jio me out :x

Joanne: Relink > www.J-oanne-hack-it.blogspot.com
--Sure (:

Xiaox: hellos (: tagged takecares.
Xiaox: LOL >< style="font-style: italic;">--Rofl. Thanks. Appreciated. Give me your link leh. Me lazy find :x

Vaney.L: Now what nian dai alr, noone run home alr. HAHAHA, I miss you ): 9 years hor. You continue dont come
Vaney.L: school. I want kit-kat with you , you know. >): Hmphs. Come back la. You still have the time to
Vaney.L: catch up if you need , you know. ): Study, is for your future girl.
--No time liao. Honggan liao. English fail liao. Gone case liao :D

jy: EH ZU DI TAG u liao orh ah lian=P be happy that i tag u!!HAHA lol no one run home liao lar;D
--Hahas, Fuckyou hard hard laa.

MIKOOO: FINALLY JUDITH IS BACKKKKKKKK
--Siao. One week only -.-

mjxD: finally~
mjxD: loves you my dear judith dar=D
mjxD: lols!
mjxD: all sleeping?
mjxD: lols
mjxD: no body taq you de ar
mjxD: im back
mjxD: loves<333333333>mjxD: lols
mjxD: brb agn
mjxD: i go eat
mjxD: okay
mjxD: ^^
mjxD: heart
mjxD: your
mjxD: in
mjxD: forveer
mjxD: im here
mjxD: you didnt lost me woah=D
mjxD: loves
mjxD: loves
mjxD: love
mjxD: loves
mjxD: ME LOVES YOU
mjxD: dar
mjxD: da
mjxD: dar
mjxD: da
mjxD: dar
mjxD: ar
mjxD: dar
mjxD: lols
mjxD: back!
mjxD: mwahahahahahs
mjxD: later i come back again spamm!
mjxD: me loves you
mjxD: i swear^^
mjxD: darling,if anything happened to you,the consequences i face wif you bah!
mjxD: jiayous,have confidence in yourself
mjxD: what you want to do now just do it!
mjxD: listens to your heart and mind
mjxD: seriously
mjxD: i know you're confused about what you doin now
mjxD: darling always loves you
mjxD: me loves you
mjxD: listens to me okay?
mjxD: but it wont settles everything
mjxD: not goin home also good i think
mjxD: goin home le tell me bah
mjxD: breakfast woah!
mjxD: eat
mjxD: must
mjxD: will
mjxD: always
mjxD: i
mjxD: and
mjxD: you
mjxD: i loves
mjxD: lols
mjxD: i misses you
mjxD: im tired
mjxD: lols!
mjxD: spamm spammmmmmmmm
mjxD: im spamming
mjxD: must eat woah
mjxD: hais..dar.i loves you=D
mjxD: D=
mjxD: d=
mjxD: d=
mjxD: D=
mjxD: im worred=[
mjxD: just ring me up if anything happens
--Crazy pubor kia. Keep spam spam spam. Me want Dunhill / Viceroy / Next / Marlboro ! Lovesu. See you soon!

qiyin: yo! how ya doing? Hvnt see u in class lately..,do come bck o!
--Im back but nothings inproving so ya...

deborah: cb nvr write happy birthday to me @ post. fark you lar. smemre tua me. i call u nvr ans
Deborah♥: derrius - you suck **** lar. hahas. she's mine, you hor, so childish~ tsk X:
Deborah♥: SIS, I MISS YOU
Deborah♥: lamelamelamelamelame,boredboredboredboredbored, derrius sucks, big time!
--Melovedieyou la sis. You know that deep deep deep in your heart right. Derrius = No suck. Judith then = suck. D:

Joshy: jellyf!ps abt today ah!and dont listent someone like shengjie la wth-.-you think he wad,wise man?-.-
--Laughs. Dua hai laa you. Change le la got girl. Pui. Despise you!

MILLIELEE: NOTHING'S MY PROBLEM !
--You cockster never die la! :x

babykellie.: sis, you back not?
/ Babykellie 's .: S I S T E R ! :}
/ Babykellie 's .: yesyes, sister all the best
--Im always with you la sis.

YONGYAN: baobei, meet up soon. contact me eh! i miss you:D
--Okay. You contact me laa bohxim kia !

-/!Rachelchee: Jiejie, faster come back!(:
-/!Rachelchee: Jiejie, cheer up eh!(:
--Im alr back(: Thanks for the concern, and dont find trouble, me heard from people alr, guai yi dian! (:

MIKOOO: HELLO JUDITH JIEH! (:
MIKOOO: HELLO JIEH JIEH! dun cut yr hand ! pain pain de ;D
MIKOOO: HELLO JUDITH JIE !
--Hi (: Never la.

YiLin's: Tkcare. You will be alright ^^
--I'd wish :x

jiehao: takecare..!smile
--Jing Liang laaaaaaaaa. Zz.

.: Takecares . You wanted me to leave , so now , i'm leaving . Byes . Tc many .
--Dont leave ):

chiahweeshan: hello(: link me yeah? i add you in msn ah:D
--Sure(:

Tiny.L: Yo ! relink me ;D
--Sure(:

California: HI , Tag .
--Thanks(:

dalston: boxim never see my birthday there D; .
--You also never give me-.-

windz: hey , passing by ;D
--Hahas, alrights.

JUDITHLIM:D: Laughs. Im fineee ~ Lovedieeallofyous <3>--I hate you la cbk. Im beoing retarded by replying my own tag._.

Yexiang: hello (:
--Hi. You another one. Change liao. Hais.

Huizhong: Darling I miss you . Meet up soon uhh :B
--Contact me laa dey! :x

&ilove-dyouso.

Remorse.

2009-09-30T05:09:00.000-07:00

Clinton's words :
Difficult to forget, too late to forget ._.
How to let myself resign from remorse and denial.
D: Givesup.
~

& ilove-dyouso.

2009-09-29T03:29:00.000-07:00

I DONT WANT ANYONE TO LEAVE.
Im stuuuupid.
God, what the hell is wrong?
Wasting time waiting for a miracle that will never happen?
Am I destined to lose all my loved ones?
Don't go away ):
Please.

&ilove-dyouso.

For The Better

2009-09-28T05:09:00.000-07:00

If you find that someone is a little hard to handle today, just realize that you'll probably need to be extremely diplomatic right now. So be sure that you give plenty of thought to how you deal with any difficult people at this time. And be aware that this could really be a good opportunity to put the past behind you.
~
Made my choice to stop.
stuuuuuupid me.
Idiot, what everyone calls bai chi :x
Went to school, did nothing.
Life returned to normal, no mood to post eh, just decided to reply the long overdue tags eh.
Think its really over now ((:
Finally, *smirk.
Nobody needs to know what it is,
Nobody needs to care.
Just sorry sister, for cutting my hand once more.

&ilove-dyouso.

A Thousand Apologies.

2009-09-24T04:28:00.000-07:00

You ought to be able to make some enormous strides when it comes to straightening out a few financial issues today. So just try to put any old doubts or fears aside for the time being. Some unexpected financial rewards could have you feeling pretty excited right now. And some positive developments regarding a career or family matter could leave you feeling a little relieved as well.
~
Few points to stress,
#1;
I'm back from running home from last Wednesday till Tuesday night,
Returned from tuition that night.
Went to police station to cancel the run home case & bpc,
I'm fine now other than the fighting case in school.
All the best for me.
#2;
So sorry Bebe Sister,
I'll change, at least, for you,
I will treasure my beloved sisters,
Dont wish to elaborate any more,
Guess I dont see the need to eh,
Lovesu.
#3;
A.
You are very irritating, you realise?
What you did, what you said, whatever your intention, you said it aloud.
And it hurt not that much, then slowly fading,
However, you decided to continue with your antics.
You words are contradicting!
You made another choice and let it be known to me,
Now, I'm lost.
B.
I left you.
I left you.
I left you.
You sure?
I left you.
What the fuck.
Irritating, but, oh well, dont know what everyone sees in me.
Im really not up to anyones standard eh.
Just leave me alone and all will be best (:

Okay.
I'm darn lazy to post about everything everything that is happening eh.
Thoughtless.
Moodless.
Emotionless.
Gone.
Lazy to reply tags,
Super long, tomorrow i reply okays.
Its a deal.

&ilove-dyouso.

Returning To The Present

2009-09-23T07:43:00.000-07:00

Judith Is Back :D

Goodbyes.

2009-09-18T00:35:00.000-07:00

JUDITH run home.
SHE gt bpc.
SHE gt police case because she beat yaqing.
SHE gt run home case.
SHE wont update so frequently.
wish her gd luck(((:
she rmbers all her friends & sisters,
so if anything happens,
wish her all th best :D

Manipulated By You.

2009-09-15T03:58:00.000-07:00

The stars recommend discretion. Don't do or say anything too over-the-top today.
~
Seems like the horoscope is true :x
Soooooo bored uh._.
Rotten men just go for looks.
Ugh, imperfection.
Tell me you'll love me & will till you die,
Like music, you thrill me with beautiful lies.
Kaninaaa~
Pon school today,
Actually only intended to late,
who knows WeiTing Sister called,
Me, WeiTing, Bebe & YeongKhen Kor late together go 496 eat.
Reached and Prawn came along.
Ate together then went Prawn's house slack,
Audition awhile see some lame gay show,
Left because Prawn need go Hougang then we met Joey Sister below.
Slacked damn long saw Derrius & YeXiang.
Cocked about things to be untold,
Everything say there end there.
Sisters, I know I'm dumb though.
Wish i can 'xing xing' [Wake Up My Idea]
Can't seem to remove myself from this dream that mostly is a nightmare.
Alrights, stop the cocking, went HKE slack, Joey left then proceeded to YeongKhen's house.
Slack there few hours then return home :D
Boring day.
Huayi called though.
Hope nothing happens.
Retarded me~

replies to tags((:
Derrius :D: Ew ! I sing song at phone you also wanna say >< !
Derrius :D: -> Deborah : Yalaaaa , yours lahhhs . Hahahas . Tc
--Laugh, cannot ah.? Got yi jian ah.? Hahas, always scold me still dare say :xx

MIKOOO: oh she can meh? kidnap her ! hahah
--Laughs. So funny. Haha. Zz D:

YLin's: Cheerup k! Jyjy, i now also chionging my studies, like abit too late but, better late than never ^^
--Hahas, feel like giving up._.

CLARA(:: ROFLS , Wan kidnap me ?! Dream on (: , hahahahs~ , YOu wanna go out with me rites?cann...
CLARA(:: Wed come my schooll..... i brinq theese chi0bus come my hse .. , thannnn i slack wif eu'all can?:D ~
CLARA(:: Happy liaos? ps , judith .. need eu copy alot of my taqs >.<" all b'cos of stupid mikooo! LOLS
CLARA(:: Judith dun feel sad okays!(: , Although eu and C settle le , Iwillalwayslovesyouslas<3>
CLARA(:: Don't feeel sad okays , got alot people at ur side , dun make them worry!(: , wed come find me k?:X
Clara(:: Jies <3>
--Hahah, sis. Dont act cute leh. I try my best to smile each day with extreme effort, after all, I dont live for myself :x

Deborah♥: Derrius- fine lorrr ! she was waiting for YOURS ! D; sad lar, my gf kena snatched.. *cry*
Deborah♥: Judith- you v good! ps me todayyy. soooo good. i'll remember this >:B i WILL ! & i shall plot a rev!
Deborah♥: JUDITH- BTW, PUBOR SIS. MY BIRTHDAY CMING LIAO! INTEND TO BUY WHICH SHOP OF JEWELLERY FOR ME ?!
Deborah♥: JUDITH - SK jewellery or LEE han HWA jewellery ;D ?
--SIS. Do you think you are very cute.? Do you think you act cute very cute.? If you think you are, then you're right;D Thats your bad thing you know, what we talking the whole day at 466 :x YOU TOO CUTE LIAO LAA~

Vanessa.L: Juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu. I want kitkat.
Vanessa.L: I very sad.
--Sad ah.? Want kitkat ah.? CALL POLICE LAR:D hehe. fake ._.

jiehao: ur birthday rmb invite mi orhs tc
--Siao. Later you come get beaten.

&iloveyouso.

HAPPYBIRTHDAY WEITING.

2009-09-13T08:05:00.000-07:00

If the boss is a big problem, don't worry; they won't be an issue much longer.
~
chao jaydai.
sibei sian.
Mj's big happy family come up talk cock again.
Soooo damn cock.
insult my mother agn give you all hell uh.
planning my revenge;D
sooooo disturbed.
few categories to emphasize on.

#1-Family.
After YeXiang birthday, me ton thing, have been experiencing cold war my my mother.
Now, shortly after, Mj's thing popped up. Quite disturbing.
My mother have been utterly disappointed with my behavior but still in hope of a change present in me.
However, I guess her hopes are smashed after today's incident.
Mj's sisters & brother-in-law came up talking about the incident where Me & Mj spar.
Explained the blue blacks & can see the disheartening expression on my parents face make me wonder what have cause such a drastic change in my behavior.
Wonder if I can return to the past, wonder if they'll ever forgive me, wonder if I can ever make them proud to have a daughter like me.

#2-Friends.
Drifting apart from my dearest friends, I'd wish I can spend more time with you guys.
Now I've lost Mj. Maybe its what best for us.
Wonder if I was wrong, maybe I should get back to a normal student life.
Spend more time with my dearest sisters doing useful stuff.
Quite fed up with C on that day he keep helping Ys lie.
Thought we might not have even friendship after that incident, but at last things are cleared. My birthday is coming, lets hope my chalet planned will bring me & all my lovely friends back together once more.

#3-Money
Smoking a lot. And I mean alot.
Used to be able to pass a day since I've stopped mixing with Tmg people with less than a pack of cigarettes.
Now I'm increasing To at least a pack a day. Frustrated, I don't know how to cut down.
Less than 30 minutes I'll be complaing; Lacking nicotine.
Cigarettes are taking over my life & this is unacceptable.
And this has been causing a hole in my pocket, depriving me of other pleasures such as that.
At least I have stopped sniffing glue & consuming drugs.
I'll try to work on this, after all, my stomach can go without food.

#4-Studies
Looking at my pattern & continuing my nonsensical behavior, its mere obvious I cannot pass my Seconday Three Express End Of Years.
Wonder how disappointed my parents will be, wonder how disappointed I will be.
After all, I asked for it.
Im just too plain lazy to start the engine with the belief that its all already too late, why don't I just relax & work hard next year?
I know its a waste of time.
I know the consequences.
But i can't help it.
Ugh, how pathetic.
Wonder when I'll wake up my idea, maybe I'm just plain stupid from the start, but deep inside, I know that is just an excuse to procrastinate.
Reluctant.

#5-Relationship
Shengjie explains;
Guys are after this three things, Looks, Body, Sex.
Girls are after this four things, Looks, Money, Attention, Assurance.
Who dares to deny?
Frankly, I agree with him.
Guys give in to girls who have looks & the body they desire by providing money, attention & assurance, in return, they get their desired sex.
So disturbing.

listening to Derrius sing song on phone._.
What the fuck.

replies to tags((:
Deborah♥: lol, what happen ? grrr. btw, bright fonts are nice with dark colored bgs. but not white D:
Deborah♥: so... it's NOT NICE STILL HAHAHA , you cant out talk me lol what happen as in MJ thing.
Deborah♥: derrius - mine lar. whose siaks. of course me. everything me. hahaha :] i judith boyf.
--D: SIS! Me miss you. Come school tmr hor. Of course your msg laa~ Chey:x

Renee: Link me too:) Hahah.
--Alrights;D

Clara ;DD: Goodie~~ , sk wawa taq alonq ? , hahahs , come find me together ! Woots~~
Clara ★: Woots~ , Reply me asap !:D
Clara ★: hahahahs , i copy th star , Dun call me copycatt ! LOLS:X
--Laughs, sure;D lovesyou sister.

Derrius :D: Ass ! awaiting for whose msg sia ?
--YOUR MSG LURS :x

babykellie ★: wa sister msg you bo reply eh ;x cheer up la okeys? :}
--Limbu dian wei bo lui uh~!

MIKOOO: oh hahahs lets go out with clara den!
--HAHAH. Like she can ._.

&iloveyouso.

Insults, Disgusted With You.

2009-09-12T05:38:00.000-07:00

This is well within your reach. So go ahead and keep stretching toward the stars.
~
Nahbu._.
today th Mj's mother, sister & sister friend [ turns out to be a police._.] came my hse after tuition.
Darwin kor Shengjie & Weihao kpo come up see show.
Sibeidulan.
Her fucking mother doesn't believe I was at tuition.
Come my house kpkb.
What her daughter wants to do is her choice.
I didn't put th knife at her neck & force her.
Wakeup your idea.
Nonsensical.
Please, I'm civilised.
bathed then pei-ed D-kor, Sj & Wh to mrt station then bus-ed to jurongwest.
Met Yexiang first at his hse, no cig.
Extreme lack of nicotine today._).
Derrius then came up.
Hysterical. So extremely boring.
Me slept awhile._. Didnt realise eh.
Did nothing until 745 like that went down.
Me, D & Yx buy bubble tea.
I bought food and bus-ed home le.
Saw th scary malay guy with angkong that help me buy cig that day~
Scary. Frightnening. Boring.
Awaiting your message :X

replies to tags((:
Derrius :D: Ass , Kns . Bb . Tagged
--Laughs. Pig. Reply my messages. Will sot one :x

Yexiang: lol .
--Laughs. Big pig. Never reply my msg also this one :x

jolene: correct right sis. bright fonts are nice. but bebe say need wear sunglasses ): awww. tags.
jolene: OHYA, me forgot. ME LOVE YOU! ♥
--HAHAH. Sis. Imy Iny Ily ;D

Deborah♥: rubbish, bright fonts are not nice. * roll eyes *
--Nonsense! bright fonts are beautiful (: *kisses you on th cheek* :D

MIKOOO: oh i dunno when jio u out hahas
--Laughs, make it snappy (:

&iloveyouso.

Silence Is more tormenting than open-argument

2009-09-11T06:01:00.000-07:00

The glitter and glamour of faraway places are beckoning you to a distant shore.
~
yesterday YEXIANG birthday~
belated birthday song too youu:D
happy birthday to yous.
happy birthday to yous.
happy birthday to yexiang!
happy birthday to yous;D
claps*
cab-ed home with dar,
choinged cab._.
changed, dressed and bus-ed to jurongwest to yx's hse.
Derrius & Yx at there liao.
Mj left early for tuition.
until about 7plus,
Derrius that pig hungry we go 496 eat.
while he ate, we stared.
met Ping sis then scaryguy Weixiong came along.
waited th damn 99 bus,
kanina bus driver kaobei.
reached & met big guy Prawn.
went to k & book.
each person 26.50.
EXPENSIVEBODOH.
sang our hearts out,
though somewhere during th process got really, really shag._.
everyone sang well kays,
stupid Prawn never sing.
Many pictures to post eh, but com got prob, will be posting them soon(:
finished in a blink aft the cake smashing on Yx's face around 1plus.?
left at 3am where things ended.
cab-ed to jurongwest Prawn's house.
Damn hot and squeezy.
Derrius left first because he buay tahan.
Yx then around 6plus,
Wx next.
Left me & Ping at prawn's hse sleeping.
then me choing audi finally level-ed.
left Prawn's hse for Yx's hse & Derrius was alr there.
cocking about cooking Prawn, Pig & Bigger Pig for dinner ;x
great day.
enjoyed;D

replies to tags((:
Deborah: you another one, post the fonts color so bright, need to high light t read.
Deborah: Waste my time bodoh !!!! put black nicer.
Deborah: Lastly, i love you takecare of yourself okay.
--laughs, sis. CUTEMAHS. meloveyou toos! mwarcks.

MIKOOO: HAHAS ! OKK I JIO U OUT UH1
--still waiting~

MILLIE: JUDITHLIM**** !
--whatsyourproblem! :D

jiehao: invite le smile=)
jiehao: there will be a better guy for u de cheer up kays=)
--hahas. SMILING:D -.-

YLin's: luv you (muacks)
--laughs, lovesyou too;D

CLARA(:: SISSS IS LOVE-DDDD ! <3 style="font-style: italic;">--sis, me going find you soon ;D

jin yao: zu di dont sad le lar nw no one sad de lar~!
--HONGGAN LA:D

{!}Wawa: Sister ! Tagged <3 style="font-style: italic;">-- hahas. sister. faster come batok! (:

&iloveyouso.

What Goes Around Comes Around

2009-09-09T05:35:00.000-07:00

if you love something,
let it go.
if it comes back to you,
its yours.
if it doesn't,
it never was.

Decieved.

2009-09-08T07:59:00.000-07:00

miserable.
wished i hadn't known you.
shengjie gave me a good lecture,
and even darren; my tuition teacher.
here goes:
boys dont go for serious relationships.
boys at this age mostly aim for th kang.
boys hiew lan girls after they had their fun.
boys think seeing th same girl each day is boring.
boys think that gifts to girls are just an investment for that.
boys dont care how th girls feel & think.
boys msges are mostly fake.
boys lie to get out of trouble.
boys think relationships is like a game.
boys enjoy sex, and go on from girl to girl.
i believed that not all guys are like this.
turns out im starting to listen and think real hard what my fellow tuition mate & tuition teacher have said.
its okeh,its th harsh truth eh.
just hope someone can ensure me this isn't true.
but i dont think it will ever come..
after all,im not even worth for that 1 in a million guy.
ohwell._.
i'll learn to stop.
im trying real hard not to hurt myself.
i will try nt to hurt my girlfriends anymore.
suffering from lack of appetite.
dont jio me out ot eat.
i'll just stare at the food.
suffering from being unable to sleep at night.
my mobile is therefore 24h on.
not all msges wil be entertained though.

replies to tags((:
jiehao: wad ur blog mail i invite u
--icyscorpio_gb@Hotmail.com

hooonhuuui: hellos .dont sad .and stay happy . or alot of people will feel sad too .(:
hooonhuuui: oh yeahh , can you be my ganjie ?please ??? (:
--er?anything.

peishyannn: you are chio lahs ! oh , just asking mahs ,
--er?okeh.

Tiny.L: no try de ;D and welcome hahas !
--hahah.so funny ._. sien.

Xiaoace: Never go your 24 hour lan shop and 24 hour cigg sponsorer house meh?
--what the fuck is the problem with you?if you think i tgt with him for his cig & money you continue okay?

♥ CLARA(:: chey ? Why muz talk untill like so real like dhat sias ! Taqqed sis , LOVESDIEYOUS<3
--hahas.same goes for you..

MIKOOO: LOL yeah meet up soon ^^
--hahas.you jio uh.

jiahong = wind™: cheer up laas D; emo no good for health !
--jingliang._.

&ilovedyouso.

Splendid.

2009-09-07T04:21:00.000-07:00

not knowing what to do,
begging for answers everywhere.
giving up or what?
i do not know what to do.
what am i supposed to do?
sick & tired.
everything is fading away by th moment,
i think we might as well forget everything & move on.
met michael jackson [MJ] darling.
slacked with her untildk what time.
spar with her countless times,
give her so many blueblack :X
went back batok because tuition was canceled & D isn't free.
met junkang kor, zonghan daddy & ericson didi.
see kor eat then saw peirong tiantian & vivien kuku.
they are supermissed~
guys are pebbles.
sisters rocks (:

replies to tags((:
hooonhuuui: hahhahhs .peishyans sister ?Lols .
--oh? hello.

peishyannn: you are okays . LOL . welcomes . (:
peishyannn: why break ohs ? cheerup babe .
--huh?what talking you?:xx hahas,yous huanlo!

jiehao: smile=) anything cn call mi !
--rofl.orh.

yy: break lIA0?
--yalayala cockster ._.

♥ CLARA(:: Hais~ Really wish you're my Da-sao rather than G.Jie , Hope you both will patch?MELOVEYOUS<3
--hahas,if only th world is perfect oh?

Passer: why break? faster patch!!! wish you goodluck(:
--laughs. thanks eh.

yang yang: lols...dun be sad ya...uii will find a better guy...anyways yr translation buay pai seh..
--ofcourse. i who ley^^

Celestene.: Hey, I'm Clinton's Mummy. Can you add my Msn? Have things to talk to you about. Thnks.
--added~ ;D

MIKOOO: hey? u breal le uh? why breal luh? mai sad leh cheer up! ily <3
MIKOOO: LOL clara relax !
--rofl,meet up soon eh.

Tiny.L: be strong ;D
--i'll try my best^^ thanks eh.

Vivien: kUKU Stead ah , cheerup alright. you'll find a better one , lovesyoumuch la
Vivien: Ohyeah link me up okay.
--laughs, sure.i'll be fine.wo jing tian bu shi hao hao de(:

Babykellie.: sister, you alright?
--i'll be fine sis, dont worry ehh.

♥ CLARA(: -Celestene: You sure you mummy anorts? Tell me at hme if you're , if you're not , Don't come here and fakefake !
♥ CLARA(: -Celestene: My mum name not Celestene okays !(:
--sis,relax lur.she C's GanMummy (:

YLin's: Cheerup! anything can msg me k ^^
--sure will de^^ meet me soon yeah.

-PASSERBY-: Taggged :") niceblog
--thanks;D

crystal: hhaahah judith nice blog
--thanks girl:D

&iloveyouso.
*i'll be fine..//

Shimmering.

2009-09-04T18:22:00.000-07:00

one day without yous is hell.
cries th whole night,cant imagine life without you.
i need you in my life,
but i cant have you in my life & suffering at th same time.
you yi zhoing ai jiao zuo fang shou.
i hate myself but i really cannot patch.
i want topatch so badly..
but it will only bring more disputes,sadness,anger.
iloveyou,
iwilltrytoforgetyou.

Comma,Fullstop.

2009-09-04T05:50:00.000-07:00

thend.
i'll be fine guys & girls.
jingliang wont hurt myself..
dontwant sis,bros&friends to be sad over me.
yah..thats all.
he could find a better girl,definitely!
im so lousy eh.
but he cannot take it,neither do i,
whats left but this option.
hais.
nt meant to be?
painful,but its best for you,best for me.
end our misery.
i dont think i can ever not contact males,
and i dont think you can ever not contact females,
we will therefore continuequarreling and never solving th problem.
wo zuo bu dao,ni ye zuo bu dao.
wei he?
is so difficult for me.
i know it hurts for you too.
but each time we quarrel,no matter how small or big,
the hurt remains forever.
i had enough,im so sorry.
im not ready to patch.
i need someone who really understands me and fully trusts me.
hais.
shag.
The sky is so gray that it looks like it just cried
After leaving you
I did not gain more freedom
The sourness from the air
Smelling out our distance
A scene of of heartbreaking ending
Like breathing, unable to stop.
The yellowed diary in the drawer
pressed dry our memories
That smile is summer
Our past
Has been forgotten as time goes by
A love that lacked oxygen.
Careless tears are unnecessary
I know that it is not your fault or mine.
We just forgot how to step back
We made promises to each other with confidence
Yet it has been emptied by time
I know that it is not your fault or mine
It's just that letting go would make things easier
shimmer of hope.

Taboo.

2009-09-04T04:47:00.000-07:00

nahbu.
sibei luan.sibei messy.
always quarrel,wei he?:xx
hais.
pekcek.confused.
idk what to do!
should i just leave things alone or take action.
should i take precautions or put complete trust.
should i continue hrting myself & him or try to bear & change it.
is this my real happiness or just an illusion.
im so,so,so pathetic.
igiveup,seriously feel like never waking up from sleep.
who really really really cares,right?

replies to tags((:
Adeline ,: jiejie , last longggggg (: see you soon . Take care ! Love.
--laughs,i wished for all of my relationships to last long,but turns out to be th same ehh..

BRYAN:D: hi judith, i'm gary's friend. LOL. i think i know clinton leh ;o i like his angkong <3 style="font-style: italic;">--oh?okehh.hello:xx

Deborah{♥}: er, happy one month one day ? late better than nothing =D ?
--sister is fucking loved mansxc.

Derrius: Girl Tagged . Hahas . Your post still no change ehs .
--now change liao rights._. haiyos. thanks eh.for so much :xx

jiahong = wind™: yo ! here to taq,dont say i bad no taq you . here's your taq (: hahas .
--ahahas.tag more o
often laaa~ :xx

Jeanice: hellos . (: tagged . takecares . link me alrights ? (:
--ummm.you are?

hoonhui: hello . passed by . remember me ?phpps de .Lols .tagg-ed .(:
--er?nt really:xx

JOEY: LOL,the one who tagged you all the while?? O:
huayi de or swiss de? :xx

Tiny.L: i wher got act cute ?
--gotgot.you sibei fucking act cute.rofl,when give wo yan?:D

♥ CLARA(:: YAYS ~ I AM LOVED (: . LOLS !! BY WHO?:D
--by me laa!nomatter what is going to happen between me & your brother jie always loves you:D

XueJun: TAGGED
--thanks girl,you are missed:D

&iloveyouso.

I laugh for you, I cry for you.

2009-09-02T03:37:00.000-07:00

today also never fo anything.
nothing much to talk.
hang-ed out with sisters as usual,
got caught for ponning class._.
onthwayy to becoming a good girll~~
ahahhahas.
baby only let me smoke 5stick a day.
howto live?
D:
cries*

replies to tags((:
JOEY: HAH,THANKS :d
--er?yous which joey?! laughss~~

MIKOOO: HELLO! tagged
MIKOOO: hello!
MIKOOO: HAPPY ONE MONTH!
--hahas,thanks:D tkcares yah.

Raey: i'll try to hahaha rlly! I'm so sorry but life is being heck anal nowadays so yeah D:
--ahahahas~boredbored.sorry eh dua yous last sunday:xx

dindin: yah, the shortest hair there.
--shud be th most fierce onee:D

Derrius :D: Tagged too Got msn ?
--laughs,added eh(:

BASIC IDENTITY: NEW COLLECTION LAUNCHED! AFFORDABLE CASUAL DRESSES @ http://basicidentity
--thanks fer th offer(:

小Blur: Hello . Jux passed by . Anw . Tagged . Hahas .
--laughs,thanks,btw,youare?:xx

Clara ;D: Come and taqqq mine bloqqq :B . Taqqed ! <3 Jie alrights(:
Clara ;D: taqqed me alrights(: ! Loveeeees <3
Clara ;D: LoLS :X . Jie karma 0 !! Type in Karma more kkaes ! :B
Clara ;D: wows ! Jie karma 0, Type in Plurk more to get KARMA ! . Loveeees <3
♥ CLARA(:: hheys , I no harts ~ very sadd . Tat's wad eu said juz now ~ Laughhhs ! :X
♥ CLARA(:: Loveeeees <3 src="http://www.cbox.ws/smilies/1/grin.gif" alt=":D" border="0"> .
♥ CLARA(:: Happy 1 month with my brother ! (: .
--thanks loads sis:D you are loveeeeed!:D

peishyannn: hahas ! (: stay chio ..
peishyannn: hello . happy one month with clinton ohs ! (: hahas
--not chio from th start:xx thanks anyways:D

Passer: nevermind. she just change already.
--ohhh?thats just what you think:D

jie hao: jy for ur exam:D passby ur blog nia haha jy
--haha.orhs._.

Pamella: Judith! Misses. ;D comment me kays. <3
--ahahahs~ sure sure:D meetupsoooon:D

gary: who bully euu?
YOU&MINGXIONGLAAA~~ D:

Vivien: KUKUSTEAD , call me when you see this alright . ^^ 94363114 . Heartzx you alot la.
--hahahas~ now want pei dabors donwant sister liao wor! i rmb 2sept`09 :D

babykellie.: wa sist ah, aku call plus msg you dk how many times eh! get back phone msg me oh
--gt reply liao rights(: phone gt money liao mahhhhhh~~

Tiny.L: Hello ! ;D
--HELLO!:D nahbu.actcute:D

jolene: happy one month(: all the best ya sist. pei us more also. loves.
--meloveyoualltoo laaaaas.wont pangseh you all ders:D

Passer: Happy one month(: wish ur last long long
--thanks(:

Xiaox: yo baby <3 sorry for forgetting eh (: you sure forgive me de rights ?:D hahah ok uh loveyous (:
--laughs,meloveyoustoo! rmb 2month what baby promise me ahhh~~ :D

:D: first month 1st september. second month not on 1st october mehszc =XX
--yahhh~thanks me just realised:xx rofl.

YLin's: Steadddd! Last long alrights! ^
--laughs.thanks stead:D

&iloveyouso.

Happy One Month Judith && Clinton(:

2009-09-01T01:07:00.000-07:00

HAPPY ONE MONTH JUDITH AND CLINTON !(:

hellos all(:
I'm clara , not the chiobu Judith(:
Today's their one month :D
Wish them lastlong kkaes^^ !
Judith is strictly at my hse , playing with her boyfrenn !
Hhehehs , So she let me in her blog and let me post :P
Here's some crap !! (:
Iloveyous Judith <3>
Iloveyous Judith <3>
Iloveyous Judith <3>
Very lame sias ~ now she's looking at the post :B
Stupid sheeeee ~
lols ... On th way wating for audition patch ,
I was using internet ~ (:
Judithhh ~ Last long with Clinton Kor alrights(: !
Loveeee yarhs ! <333>
Exited , Muiclarameixinmei<3

continuing from clara~~
JUDITHHERE:D
TODAY me boyf and wo onee month:D
happy happy.
he forgot until i reminded him in th morning:xx
asshole rights!
ROARS.
ilovemybabyforlife:D

&iloveyouso.

I Am Torn.

2009-08-27T05:59:00.001-07:00

HAPPYBIRTHDAYLINCOLNDIDI
laughs,funny day.
school ended in a flash,
bio test was a killer,mr lim is going to murder me:xx
slacked with baby after school,then went home and to 283 th sintua.
met my friends:D
LOVETHWHOLELOTSOFTHEM.
`mingjie daddy, `yaoxian, `hankuan kor, `mingxiong, `hongxiang, `alex, `xavier kor, `gary, `yingyou,`maimai, anyone i missed out?
._.
siansxc.
saw kevin & bernard's hiadis?
i nt sure ley.
twist with him :D
memories.
solong never see them langsai lerr:DD
jiayous tongyi(:

replies to tags((:
JIN YAO!!!: hello!!!WHEN i bully u leh dk which ah lian wan jio me 1v1-.-
--imagoodgirl!thats final:D

dindin: you link first uh.
--linked:D saw you today ah?:xx

Raey: ehlo there love hahaha miss ya. Like seriously. Keep in touch ok hope to meet up soon : D
Raey: (btw you're in trouble if you dont rmb me muahaha :] )
--i rmb yous sister:D try to go nxt sunday yeah:xx loves:D

&iloveyouso.

Hope You'll Remain By My Side.

2009-08-26T04:32:00.000-07:00

ilovemyboyfriend:D
soboring.
have bad feeling my days are numbered..?
laughs.
think im thinking too much,ohwells.
have biology test tmr uh.
siansxc.
feel like murdering~!
fooooooook.~
ilovemysisters too.
difficult month for me,
quarreled so many times.
haish.
sisters are for life okay.

replies to tags((:
Clara ;D: hahahas (:okok , JIEEE <3
Clara ;D: Hellos (: . HAHAHAS . Taqqed . saw u ytd at my hse <3 =
Clara ;D: HAHAHHAS ! I TRUST EU ~ That's why i tell u my pw (:
Clara ;D: heyys jie ~ naber take my birthdate T.T . 25June 1999 <3
--laughs,i very good right!hais.your brother make me sadsad D:

xiaox: baby.. passerby saying who
xiaox: Joshua's master ? than you help how many people suck **** ah ? say leh say leh.. limpei want know
xiaox: Dont at there lyk some dog hiding eh (:
xiaox: Baby ah Baby ! Me Loves You <3 class="pn_std">
Xiaox: wahh baby. so long no update liao ar you ? haha Loveyous <3
--hahhas~now bu shi update liao lor?:xx MELOVESYOUTOO!

JIN YAO!!!: wad ahbeng!!i guai kia ok^^v dont anyhow day wor
JIN YAO!!!: wad smelly ah bang!!!i guai kia ok~!!!100% lar not like u~!!!
--ME THENN IS SUPERGUAIKIA OKAY!roars.see me always bully me:xx

YiLinnn,(L): Link me up k! (;
--linked(: stead.

jack: haha. zzz. sian. haha. bhb arh! super guai kia siak!
--REALLY MAH.then like yous mehs?

dalston: hellos tag (:
--rofl?._.

Joshua's Master: eh you kena fcuk-ed how many times already?
--honggan you huan lo.

YONGYAN: BAoBei uh, RELAX luh! haiyo. so angry for?! whad happen siol? o.o meet up soon! miss you:D
--1iloveyous.laughs.faster contact me.

peishyannn: yeah , she told me . (: she say you sibei friendly . (: hahas . saw You today ! (:
--ofcourse(:

Joshy: Joshua's master,fcuk your own mother la you dog,got balls write ur fuking name down u useless dog-'-
--laughs,relax lur!

minjieX=: guess bad things really came through after all,im crapping.forget it,take cares.
--yeah you're crapping:xx

Derrius :D: Hahas . How you found my blog ? Link me up ! Takecares .
Derrius :D: Hm , not really , but heard your name from liping and jiahong . Hahas .
--linked!free jio me out slack eh;D

MIKOOOOO♥♥: hey ! ya lor yukino is not pretty at all! haha!
--hahas,hiew lan her lurs:xx

Jingci.: Ps, didn't pick yr call just now o: Add you on msn, easier to contact. ^^
--its okay(:

JOEY: Passedby through benard's blog,ya. Qiuya sucks like fcuk.
JOEY: LOL,yea. She kep guailan me -.- LOL,heck care liaos.
--laughs,relax lur,just ignore her yeahs.

Babykellie 's. ♥: wahs, msg yous no reply deys.
--paisae la sister! me fone tio confiscate cansxc?laughs.

Passer: for what to hate qiuya so much? she in sch quite guai mah
Passer: but serious get to know her better le. think she actually not that bad.
Passer: and she change after all those things happen.
Passer: just some comment[= hope you won't mind. if you don't want to care. it's ok for me
--laughs.its alright!i think i know her longer than youguys.she guai? guailan uh?laughs.

Weijie: relink.
--relinked:D dont so fierce lur..still friends rights..

小Blur [ Rosie ]: Hello . Know euu on Fs . Mind linking mii ? Tq . (:
--laughs,linked:D

Lincoln: OIII ! Sister , Update .... tagged
--update liao laaa~~ :DDD

&iloveyouso.

What can I still cherish If I can barely control my own pulse?

2009-08-17T04:15:00.000-07:00

fucking shag.
if only bebe let me 1on1 with that girl..
might have been able to release some anger..
guess no one can trust me,after all..

replies to tags((:
YiLinnn,(L): Steaddddd, luvs (L)
--laughs,loves toos:D

jingqqi: tags again ;D tc !
--rofl,you too ehs.

MIKOOOOO♥♥: i invite u le ...brian bad bad bad!!!
MIKOOOOO♥♥: hey link mi up thxs i invite u le and i link u le !
--yeah,thanks eh(: sure eh:D

☆Lincoln☆: JIEJIE ! now i guai oredi ? Tc
☆Lincoln☆: YAOYANG ! sup rmb me ? Gimmi your hotmail , put it here
--haihao lur,gt room fr improvement.want steal my G.di ah!laughs.

Joanne: View and Tag. (:
--appreciated:D

peishyannn: nope , i saw you okays ! lol . (: stay chio .
--laughs,saw your sister todays:D

yang yang: lols...an zhua so angry.?hu dare provoke uii seh.?
--mai cock lur di!:x

Clara ;D: Hellos ! Judithh ! Can be my Gan-jie ? (: Hope you canzxc (((: .
--sure(:

Tiny.L: Hello
--hi?rofl.

JIN YAO!!!: hi AH LIAN~!^^v
--si smellyahbeng.

jack: haha. ah lian worh. zzz. sian. hah. tagged
--superguaikia cansxc.

passer-by: knn snatch my dear nvm his virgin already mine
?you are?

Lao Jun: Lol
--you are?._.

&iloveyouso.

Route To Happy-ness.

2009-08-13T05:49:00.001-07:00

KANINA.
SORRY JINGXIANG I DUA YOU TODAYS D:
wont dua you agn ler okays.
dont angry angry):
laughhs:D

replies to tags((:
MIKOOOOO♥♥: i wan invite u to my blog wads yr email???srry i cannot last long le
--icyscorpio_gb@hotmail.com dont sad lur,nt you nt gd,is he not good okays((: tcs.

xiaox: kill him ? no luhhh.. talk **** with him lah
xiaox: eeeeeyer ;x i got meet you meh ? hahahaa. JOKING xD
xiaox: Baby dont fierce ley. scared scared lehh.. hahaha (: Iloveyous <3
--rofl.i where gt fierce?dont anyhow leys.go die lurrrrsxccc:D

yang yang: y uii keep limbu here lim bu there huh.?lolx
--WHY NOT HAPPY ARHS.no lur very dulan marhs):

Clara ;D: Hahahahs . Thanks Yeahhhs ! LOVE DIE YOUS TOO ! <3 ;D
Clara ;D: Judithh !! Link meee ! And go my blog taqq yeahhs ! lovedieyous <3
Clara ;D: here's the linkk
Clara ;D: www.th-only-love-wuchun.blogspot.com
--laugh,sure((: tkcares ah!seeyous tmr:D

&iloveyouso.

Crying In The Crowd,You'd Wish You're Invisible.

2009-08-12T05:44:00.000-07:00

LAUGHS.
mit baby so early today.
feel like sleeping.
school was a disaster.
kanina pubor.Limbu stomach pain & sick You tell Limbu run.Limbu never bring collar badge huan tio You ahs.chaocheebye.Dm see me also never tell me run You huanlo so much for fuck?Tell Limbu at 715 wait until 720 that time Limbu wait until 725 You never come Limbu go back class also let you scold?!Kanina.Limbu eat medicine that causes drowsiness You also kaobeh.Limbu sick la hor.nahbueys.Limbu run asthma die later many ppl fuckyou upsidedown insideout uh.hoggan lur.LIMBU NOT YOUR DOG OKAY.you then my dog.
okay i did my piece(:
im bored now.
siansxc.

replies to tags((:
MIKOOOOO♥♥: heyyyyyy judith!!! may u last long ~
--laughs,thanks(: you too eh.

Renee: Hi hi, tagged.
--rofl,hi. never call jie le,naughty((:

Jingci.: HI, RELAX ^^.
--you couldnt,if you are me.

☆Lincoln☆: heyyyyyy judith!!! may u last longlong long long longlong till you die .
--laughs,thanks((: never call jie,naughty.

Passer: Qiuya in my sch lol
Passer: Qiuya lock blog leh. cant go in -.-
--hahas,she scared ppl spam mahs.

peishyannn: hahaha . TC . and relac .
--hahas,saw you today:D

xiaox: wah qiu ya ah -.- erxin eh baby ! (: hahahahah..
xiaox: o.o ehh yaoyang.. want come meet me ? haha... LOL
xiaox: call and contact me luh ;x 92382600
--horhor!whatyou wanna do to my G.didi? LAUGHS.

Clara ;D: Hello ~~ Hahahs . Taqqed fer sister in law DD . LOL ~
--HAHAS.you super cute cansxc:D loveyou!(:

&iloveyouso.

Sisters First? You Sure?

2009-08-10T05:56:00.000-07:00

LAUGHS.
the girl who made me gain so much hatred to make me disown her.
now i realise why so many ppl dislike her so much.
she wasnt worth me love from the start?
call yourself my sister.
pui.
there she is right infront of your eyes,
may i present to all,
promotion;
LINQIUYA.
http://www.th-fades-away-love.blogspot.com/
`13
`swiss cottage secondary 1t1
`emolover_xiaoaii@hotmail.com
`SINGLE AND AVAILABLE LEY!WHO WANT?
`who wants her number please look for me.she'll be glad to know more guys.terms&conditions apply.
*t&c: WHILE STOCKS LAST(:

ps:this is how much anger you pt in me,qiuya.wakeup your idea.
:D

replies to tags((:
CALIFORNIA: Hello. Jinger ask me whether can you , be her Gan Jie ?.
--laughs,sure(:

jingqqi: heyho ;D taggs back (:
--hahahs,thanks,friend:D

JIN YAO!!!: EH!!!LOL..HI ^^v taggg u lar hor!!!
--thank you la!holiday you kana pwnsxzc.laughs~~

jiehao: tc=) urself happy birthday singapore hahs
--rofl.will la.

peishyannn: nehmind . (: takecare anyways . getwell soon ! D
peishyannn: what happen to Qiuya again ? o.o mai too angry .
--laughs.i reli cnnt tk it alrs.make me sibei sot!:x

jack: ni ji xu larh horh
--i will ju xu de okays!laughs.

Passer: qiuya like very step urh?
--yalors.hais.how you know her?:x

yaoyang: hahahha...he my pri sch fren lei-.-
yaoyang: c i have time den go find u lar..vry busy lei
--you say de arhs(:laughs. tc, di:D

&iloveyouso.

Isolated In A Spiral Of Lonliness

2009-08-09T05:34:00.000-07:00

HAPPYBIRTHDAYSINGAPORE:/
was super sick,
fever 39.3degrees, sore throat, cough, flu, muscle ache.
thought have h1n1,
heng my fever dropped today.
so disappointed with qiuya,
dont call me sister anymore until you prove to me you're worth it.

replies to tags((:
peishyannn: she go spread say what i confirm very happy cus you never come down slap me . she still say is Qiuya
peishyannn: say eh . -.-
--huh?dont understand:x

☆Lincoln☆: taggeedd jiejie , i am so bored . no gans peii me T.T
--laughs go find qiuya lur-.-

Passer: What did Qiuya do? Oh, cheer up
--she very,idk how to say lur.dont know how to believe her anymore..

xiaox: Takecare leh ! (: Loveyous <3 style="font-style: italic;">--laughs(: ily toooo~ :x

&iloveyouso.

Promises,

2009-08-07T06:52:00.000-07:00

todays morning mit bby,
was angry,he tot i cor dabor,but i cor de is zhabor..
then,aiya.
late go in school,around 820?
slackedwith yeongkhen G.korkor & roy G.korkor & pin lurs?
siansxc.
lessons was boring,nearly slept during chemistry lesson.
boring fucking national day cock draggeduntil 1.
wanted to attend mrlee's supp,
turned out he canceled ._.
choing-ed down find bby @ his hse,
minjie came aft a short while along with jingci & a girl?she taller than me:x
shi bai.im 15 and only so short:x
slaaaacked damn long with bby's little sister and be came down(:
having fever.sore throat.slight cough and flu.die.h1n1.
blahblah dont feel like mentioning everything.
so bored of life.

replies to tags((:
Joshy: old cb!!! all play cheat one): hahahahha
--ahahahs.fun okays:x

xiaox: baby sio ! who is gary girlf ? Iloveyous <3 class="pn_std">xiaox: wahh.. who yaoyang and peishyann ? LOL
--laughs.gary girlf idk who,yaoyang my G.didi,peishyan hillgrove sec 2 tt one:D ahahas.

peishyannn: hahah . you know what happen between me and Qiaoyu ? o.o
peishyannn: and btw , last long with Clinton .
--laughs.dk ley.thanks((:

yaoyang: still remember me?:D hahaha wah1 now stead with clinton lei
--how th fuck you knoow him?of course rmb you lur.visit nv cor jie,naughty.

Passer: Qiuya dio dai ji u dw help meh
--depends on whether shes right or wrong,but she make me real disappointed.if she continues i will disown her.

Jam: Hello this is clinton's mei. Last long with my kor ah! (: Tc.
--lols,thanks(: takecare too.

Le-Amour Closet: Hey girls, looking for cheap and affordable apparels. GSS sale on plus new collections! Do drop-by!
--sure,thanks for th offer:D

&iloveyouso.

Crazy Lur!

2009-08-05T07:23:00.000-07:00

woke-d late,dk why?
rush-ed t school,gt caught by misswong tio lecturing for ponning class ytd:x
failedgeography,passed socialstudies,
bored:x
nothing else significant?._.
went and enjoyed counselling until 2plus then end,
slacked at shelter while waiting laohu G.korkor come find mee:DD
gt cig smk liaos:Dahahas~~
bus-ed home thenn train-ed to yewtee mit josh,jx & jh.
ping came later onn:D
slacked & played blindmice like little kids:x
jitao laugh until so happy,
time pass so fast:x
ahahas i want play jx de psp!:x
si dong xi.
IMISSMYBOYF :\
honggan lurs.
slacked a little while more then train-ed home.
saw th who smoked last stick jio go home lers.
ps:i did smth terrible today.i koped th impact peach sweet from guardian at yewtee:x
kek.
regret cutting my hand.so gaoweiii.

~~..//
I have. . . (point for each one)

[x] smoked.
[x] consumed alcohol.
[x] slept in the same bed with someone of the opposite sex.
[x] slept in the same bed with someone of the same sex.
[x] kissed someone of the same sex.
[x]had sex.
[x] had someone in your room other than family.
[x]watched porn.
[ ] bought porn.
[ ] tried drugs.

MY TOTAL:8

[x] taken painkillers.
[x] taken someone else's prescription medicine.
[x] lied to your parents.
[x] lied to a friend.
[x] snuck out of the house.
[x] done something illegal.
[x] felt hurt.
[x] hurt someone.
[x] wished someone to die.
[x] seen someone die.

MY TOTAL: 18

[x] missed curfew.
[x] stayed out all night.
[x] eaten a carton of ice cream by yourself.
[x] been to a therapist.
[ ] received a ticket.
[ ] been to rehab
[x] dyed your hair.
[x] been in an accident.
[x] been to a club.
[x] been to a bar.

MY TOTAL: 26

[x] been to a wild party.
[ ] been to a Mardi Gras parade.
[x] drank more than three alcoholic beverages in a night.
[ ] had a spring break in Florida.
[x] sniffed anything (i taking this as something illegal...)
[x] wore black nail polish
[x] wore arm bands.
[x] wore t-shirts with band names.
[x] listened to rap.
[ ] owned a 50 Cent CD.

MY TOTAL: 33

[ ] dressed gothic
[x] dressed girly.
[ ] dressed punk. perhaps
[ ] dressed grunge.
[x] stole something
[x] been too drunk to remember anything.
[x] blacked out.
[x] fainted.
[x] had a crush on a neighbour.

MY TOTAL: 39

[x] had a crush on a friend.
[x] been to a concert.
[ ] dry-humped someone.
[x] been called a slut.
[x] called someone a slut.
[ ] installed speakers in your car.
[x] broken a mirror.
[x] showered at someone of the opposites sex's house
[x] brushed your teeth with someone else's toothbrush.

MY TOTAL: 46

[ ] consider/considered Ludacris your favorite rapper.
[ ] seen an R-rated movie in theater.
[ ] cruised the mall.
[x] skipped school.
[x] had surgery.too many
[x] had an injury.
[ ]gone to court.
[x] walked out of a restaurant without paying/tipping.
[x]caught something on fire.
[x] lied about your age.

MY TOTAL: 52

[ ] owned/rented an apartment/house.
[x] broke the law in the police's presence.
[x] made out with someone who had a gf/bf
[x] got in trouble with the police.
[x] talked to a stranger.
[ ] hugged a stranger.
[ ] Kissed a stranger.
[x] rode in the car with a stranger.
[x] been harassed.
[x] been verbally harassed.

MY TOTAL: 59

[x] met face-to-face with someone you met online.
[x] stayed online for 5+ hours straight.
[x] talked on the phone for more than 4 hours straight.
[x] watched TV for 5 hours straight.
[x] been to a fair.
[x] been called a bad influence.
[ ]drink and drive.
[x] prank-called someone.
[x]laid on a couch with someone of the opposite sex.
[x] cheated on a test.

Grand Total: 68

If You Have Less Than 10.. write [im a Goody Goody]
If You Have More Than 10.. write [im still a goody goody]
If You Have more Than 20..write [im average]
If You Have More Than 30..write [im a bad kid]
If You have more than 40..write [im a very bad influence]
If You Have more than 50..write [im a horrible person]
If You Have more than 60..write [i should be in jail]
If You Have more than 70..Write [i should be dead]

[ishouldbejail:x]

replies to tags((:
Babykellie 's.: Judith ehs! Aku miss you lahs, msg me asap yo. {:
--lols,come out slack soon yeahhshhhszxcxz.:D

☆Lincoln☆: hello. tagged(: tc.
--LOLS:D tc tooooos(:

jiehao: come yew tee bo jio mi down hahs
--ahahas,nt free.enjoying wid muh friends:DDD ._.

&iloveyouso.

Lies, And More Of Them.

2009-08-04T07:53:00.001-07:00

patch-ed with him,
slacked at home aft some chemistry work,
slept?o.o woked arnd 5plus prepared for tuition.
left and reach-ed around 5plus 6?
go find joshua G.jellyfish go smoke then go jingxiang [jx] hse.
play jx's psp (:
then awhile jiu no battery lers D:
siansxc. slacked arnd yewtee lor,
played blindmice at th playground with jiahao [jh] , jean,jx and joshua:x
bua stunt tio caught cheating :x
like only jh never cheat leys..
ahahas.
my pic uploading gt problem leys. haiyoyo.gt pic of them tgt marhs:x
hehe:x
jx you owe me tongue stud i wanttttttttt:x
boredbored):
tmr gt counselling,bio lesson,how to avoid?
at least can talk cock with muh beloved sisters tmr during counselling:D
LOVELOVE~~
lalallalas.

replies to tags((:
E.didi: jie tagged;d takecares=)
--hahas,ni ye shi:D

gary's girlf: hello. you stead with clinton ah ? Last long hor ';D
--er,you know me?or clinton?:x

qiyin: link wor! JiaYou in sch, 3e2 will be here for u ^^!
--LOLS:x try lur.sibei shagg today in school. NI YAO WO MARHS?:x ahahahs.

jack: eh!!!!!!!!!!!! only one horh. lols. got improve jiu step liao.zzz
--ahahas.pro-er than you okays:D noobshit.

Kath(L): girl , how's life . anyway , my bday is coming !!! 11 aug . haha .
--ohs?okays i know ahs.what you trying say?ahahahs.mit up soon:D

&iloveyouso.

Define Pain.

2009-08-03T21:04:00.000-07:00

todays woked at 5am plus after a bad sneeze:x
woked and saw msges he sent me.
started crying couldnt get back to slp.
knife does not seem to do th job,
searched high and low for my penknife,
played a little while and headed for school,
reached so damn early without nicotine,
waited until damn late decided to go late with weiting,
turns out she also brk with her boyf..
i never ever wanted to patch,or never did patch with anyone before.
kept clinging on to someone,so unlike th usual me.
i seem pathetic.
i blame myself.
noone shall see my cuts,they're for me and myself to see myself as a foolish stupid girl who only know how to run away and resort to such method to not think of th situation.
sosorry,i broke my promise.
i promise i'll stop aft this ordeal..
at sch comp lab,got some english sai which im nt interested to do..
have tuition later on at 8pm,
will go earlier mayb mit jingxiang,ronald,jiahao,joshua?idk.
idk what i going to do.
i'll treasure you if its worth it,
i'll learn to show you concern.
now my actions are controlled by my heart,
useless me.
going weiting G.sister hse for chivas later,
hope i'll drink away my sorrows..
imdone.

&iloveyouso.

More Than Just Your Friend.

2009-08-03T04:57:00.000-07:00

woked early,
bei bby's msg scared tio.
so confused,our thing,love triangle.
but youre th one i love boyf.
get that in your head,
weijie,dont stupid lur.
i where good?
no money,no looks,nothing.
wait for me for what?
i jitao pei bu shang any of you lurs.
bby,weijie dont cry._.
haixxxx:x
zoomed to bby's hse stressed out,
smked much,watch some movie,3hours plus went past,
not on word exchangedwith each other.
went to find zhipei G.korkor and charmaine G.baby.
did nothing in particular.
felt like cutting,but th promise rings in my head.
i used my sharp comb[notreally sharp after all] go make but like nothing one leys.
aiyoyo.sians.
bby,guai yi dian.go home(:
ahahhas~

replies to tags((:
Xiaox: Still got 1more very impt kay ! Iloveyou ;x HAHAH !
Xiaox: Somebody owe me a kiss ? LOLS ;x
Xiaox: I think going learn some new tatic liao lohhh;x hahahah ~
--yalor.always scold me ahhai.heartache want ley!ahahas..th kiss no nid giv liao lur(: postphone so many days lers.

joanne: relink me thanks. http://fcuklove-ever.blogspot.com/
--sure(:

LincolnDIDI: hello , i want meeet YOU ! JUDITH sister (:
--hahas,call me lur.stupid(:

&iloveyouso.